


I've got worse problems

by valdera



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, M/M, Texting, a mashup of jokes angst and a bunch of lil scenes, tazbb2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-10-31
Packaged: 2019-08-11 09:06:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 22,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16472654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/valdera/pseuds/valdera
Summary: Two years out of college with a useless degree in aeronautical engineering, Avi is trying his best to manage the Bureau of Balance base. With the Sight, he sees things others don’t—like the fact that supernatural creatures are living everywhere around him. Ever since his parents’ disappearance into the night two years ago, Avi has had to rely on luck and intuition in order to keep his skill alive. And for what hand in life he’s been dealt, he’s doing mostly okay. But when Magnus Burnsides, human and unaware, stumbles into his bar in an ungodly hour of the night, drunk and dizzy, Avi’s life begins to shift in ways no calculations could predict.





	I've got worse problems

**Author's Note:**

> a ridiculous amount of thanks to my two artists for this bang, @agenasu and @diistressedcitrus on tumblr. they were fun to work with!! I will add links to the art as soon as I can!
> 
> a day late bc ao3 wouldnt post my fic bc i used an emoji in it,, whoops

Taako rolls into Avi’s shop wearing shutter shades and Heelys.

It’s how he knows it’s gonna be a bad day.

“Hey, my man,” Taako greets. “I see business is booming as usual.”

The shop is empty. Avi scowls. “Where’s Lup?” he asks. “How did she let you go outside wearing this? Aren’t you supposed to be fashionable?”

“Oh, please,” Taako says. “I am the fashion. I create the rules.” He pauses. “Lup’s on a date with her jeans boy, and I’m single and depressed because Kravitz went off hunting necromancers before I got to ask him out on a date. Hook me up, Avi. I know you’ve got connections.”

Avi sighs. “Why does everyone think I run a gang,” he mutters.

“Hello? Shady, off the grid establishment where magical creatures frequent? The fact that you’re human and run one of those? Definitely mafia.”

“I hate you,” Avi groans. “I hate you so much.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Taako says. “Also, if I gave a really strong magical intoxicant to a human, what would be the side effects?”

Avi almost drops the wine bottle he’s holding. “You did what?”

“So our resident asshole, Pringles, was waving around one of his, uh, homebrews, you know, and this human I know chugged it and now he’s unconscious.”

It takes every ounce of willpower not to chuck the bottle at Taako. Avi wants to scream. Maybe he just wants to cry. But he’s never been good at multitasking.

“Why do you talk to Robbie,” he asks, despairingly.

Taako snorts. “I hate that fuck. He gets Pringles dust on my clothes. I mean, it’s not Cheetos, but it’s still pretty bad. He likes the pizza flavored ones! They taste disgusting!” He sighs. “Magnus—the human—gets overly attached to like, a rock, though, and Pringles is our neighbor.”

“Did he break into your house?” Avi asks.

Taako nods. “Knew you’d catch on, my dude,” he says. “He broke in, Magnus saw him, it’s been love at first sight.”

“This human seems to be lots of trouble,” he says. “Why do you…”

“He’s a disaster but he’s alright sometimes,” Taako answers. “And I think he talks to Pringles because there’s nobody else.”

Avi swallows. “Didn’t have to mention that,” he says.

Taako laughs. “You’re a total bro, Avi,” he says. “Stop being so nice to people. Except me. Be nice to me.”

Avi narrows his eyes. “You want something, don’t you,” he says.

Taako grins. “Alright, so, uh…” There’s a long pause in which he pushes the shutter shades up until they rest on his head, and then fusses with his hair.

“Yes?”

“I might have stepped outside in order to call Merle. I might have done that. Magnus might have disappeared when I went inside.”

“He  _what?_ ”

“To be fair, he  _was_ unconscious when I left him.” Taako shrugs. “Magnus is a big guy. He’ll be fine.”

“There’s someone roaming the streets with a bottle of fantasy alcohol in their blood and you think it’s  _fine_. It was created by  _Robbie._ ”`

“What could I do?” Taako asks. “It was called Hair of the Dog. Magnus loves dogs.”

"This Magnus sounds like a lot of trouble," Avi says, with a sigh. "I hate humans."

"You are a human," Taako points up. "You talk to humans all day."

"Yeah," Avi says. "They just do stupid things."

Taako laughs. "That's just Magnus, my dude. But you'll like him."

Avi smiles. "I can keep a lookout for him, if you want."

"Avi's Home for the Helpless Wanderer," Taako teases. "Bringing in strays all around."

"That was  _one_  time!" Avi protests. "And it was a good choice."

"I won't deny that Niki is adorable when she's not trying to kill people," Taako says. "But admit it. You're helpless. Anyone asks for help and you give them your entire life. At least with Magnus it's just, like, wooden ducks and fish and dogs."

Avi hopes he looks offended. Because he  _is_. "I'm not helpless!" he argues. "I'm nice. I would totally not help someone if they were awful."

"Yeah, but what's your definition of awful?" Taako asks. He takes a sip of his drink. "You have high tolerance, and not just for alcohol."

"Listen, Taako," Avi says, quietly, "I'm fine as I am."

Taako grins. "It's not a bad thing, Avi. You can't be as cool as me."

Avi sighs. “Okay, let’s table this discussion for now.”

“I want a fancy paper umbrella,” Taako says. “And a curly straw, and off-brand orange soda.”

“In… in your drink?” Avi asks, unsure about the sudden request. “Now?”

“Later,” Taako says, and explains nothing.

"I'm going to close up shop, and I'll help you find him," Avi decides, after a long silence.

Taako smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. His movements are elegant like usual, and he places the glass on the counter noiselessly. "Thanks,” he says, “but no. I need you here."

"No random stranger is going to walk into this bar," Avi argues, gesturing around him at the empty, oppressive space. It may be home, but it’s lonely in the night. "There's literal magic around it. I can close up and help out. It's late, I won't be missing any customers—"

"I have a feeling Robbie's weird drink mix is going to need an antidote. And you know Merle's useless under pressure. He'll just try to Zone of Truth his way out of it, and he’s on vacation anyways." Taako's voice is quiet.

"You're worried," Avi murmurs. 

Taako's face is passively apathetic. "About Magnus? Never. Dude is invincible."

"No one is strong when they're alone," Avi mutters. He swallows. "You okay?"

Taako is effortless. "I am," he says. "Another drink?"

Avi hands him a glass of wine, and Taako winks. He downs the wine in one gulp. "Bad decision," Taako proclaims, "but whatever. See you."

And he's gone, just like that.

 

* * *

 

If it were not for Lucretia, Avi would most likely be homeless. Okay, not really. He’s got a degree in aeronautical engineering, so that might have gotten him somewhere. Avi doubts it, though. He’s pretty good at blending in a sea of people, and he doesn’t think anyone would pick him out and be like, ‘that’s the one I want to hire’.

Technically, Lucretia did just that, but Avi knows it has a lot more to do with having The Sight than any other factor.

On some level, despite all that his parents have drilled into him, he knows that living a normal human life and doing normal human things just wouldn’t work out for him. The Sight is a family-inherited trait, and kind of an annoyance. Avi sees through glamours and also has the added bonus of being pretty good at knowing when someone is lying, even if it’s not a guarantee he’ll pick up on it.

Lucretia had offered to help him run a ‘base of operations’ of sorts, for her organization. So Avi sells things to people who need it, maintains everyone’s shit when they’re out killing monsters or saving the world or whatever, and Lucretia pays him. It’s a pretty good situation he’s found himself in, all in all.  

There’s a buzz from his phone and he picks it up.

 

 **Xtreme teen bible:**  @vodka how are my plants

 **Xtreme teen bible:**  are they flowering beautifully

 

Avi sighs.

 

 **vodka:**  they’re not dead

 **taakolicious:**  petition to break his phone so he can never spring this on us again

 **Xtreme teen bible:**  ;)

 **taakolicious:**  im dead. im dead.

 **ladyflame:**  lmao

 **taakolicious:**  hows ur arm candy lulu

 **jeans boy:**  I saw you three hours ago, and i’m not arm candy

 **taakolicious:**  debatable i think she keeps you around for immortality

 **taakolicious:**  also @vodka please kill merle’s plants thanks

 **vodka:**  please stop bothering me

 **vodka:**  also why is my nickname vodka

 **taakolicious:**  most important thing abt u

 

The conversation devolves into something random, and Avi isn’t feeling up to conversation, so he tidies up the store until it looks presentable. Avi isn’t even a neat person, but he cares about this place, so it’s going to look nice each night.

Just as he’s about to head upstairs, there’s a knock on the door.

Avi yawns and sighs in the same breath, and moves to unlock the door that he had literally locked two minutes ago.

When he swings it open, he’s met with the face of a man who he’s never seen before.

“New here?” Avi asks.

The man blinks slowly. “I’m real fucked up,” he says, slowly.

“Inoculation, I’m guessing?” Avi asks. “I can give you a drink to steady the pain, a little.” He laughs. “You sound like a wolf-man. I’m, uh, just a normal human, but you know, I’ve got the sight. Welcome to the Bureau of Balance, dude.”

The man grins at him. “I’ll—sit down,” he says. He takes a step forward, and trips right into Avi’s arms.

“Shit,” Avi hisses, helping the man up. “What happened to you?”

The man smiles. “Hair of the dog that bit me,” he mumbles, as Avi helps him onto a stool.

 _Fuck_.

“Your name Magnus?” Avi asks.

“Magnus Burnsides!” the man proclaims, excitement a stark contrast to the dread pooling in Avi’s stomach.

“One moment,” Avi says, voice deceptively steady, and goes behind the counter to grab his phone.

 

 **avi:**  i think i found your magnus

 **taako:**  wtf hes not mine. you deal with it

 **avi:**  HE’S YOUR PROBLEM

 **taako:**  :) hes in ur property now

 **avi:**  fuck you

 **taako:**  read 11:14 pm

 

Well, he’s alone in this.

Avi takes a deep breath, focusing. Might as well find out the situation.

“How’d you get here?” Avi asks.

Magnus blinks. “I saw the door. It had the weird emblem Robbie got tattooed on his skin after he gave me this sick drink.”

He seems to be fairly coherent at this point, which is good.

And he’s not lying, or he’s a very good drunk liar.

“You have gold eyes,” Magnus mutters. “They, uh—they’re nice.”

Avi frowns, “My—oh,” he says. His brows furrow. “Uh,” he begins, “What’s on the shelf behind me?”

“Weird containers of smoke?” Magnus answers.

 _Okay,_  Avi thinks. _Either he’s very high and somehow right, or he can see through glamors._

“You’re great,” Magnus mumbles. “You’re so nice. Your eyes are so good.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Avi replies. “A few more questions. What do Taako’s ears look like?”

Magnus scrunches up his brows. It’s actually kind of adorable, despite Magnus being, well, like, a very buff dude. “Ears?” he answers. “He wears lots of piercings.”

 _Doesn’t have the Sight,_  Avi notes.

“What do I look like?”

“Pretty,” Magnus answers. “I don’t know. A human? I’ve been seeing dragons on the street, this drink is all kinds of fucked up shit.”

Avi groans.

 

 **avi:**  holy shit Robbie's drink makes glamours wear off

 **taako:**  lmao

 **avi:**  ???????

 **avi:**  i’m chucking Robbie in prison

 **taako:**  magnus will be sad!!!

 **avi:**  magnus could be DEAD because of him but sure

 **taako:**  lol

 

Avi buries his hands in his head.

“Are you mad because I called you pretty?” Magnus asks. “Because you’re very handsome, too, if that’s the problem.”

“No,” Avi mumbles. “My life is just crumbling around me.”

Magnus seems unbothered. “We’ve all been there,” he says with a shrug, and just like that, their conversation dies out.

It’s not awkward, though. Magnus taps his fingers on the counter in a sort of rhythm while Avi contemplates his life choices. He could have just been an engineer, but he just had to inherit the family legacy. Avi bites his lip, thinking about how to this… situation. Magnus hums out a song, oblivious to the mental strain Avi is currently experiencing. The melody sounds vaguely familiar.

Avi hums it as well, and sings the first few lines of it to himself.

“You know the song?” Magnus asks.

“Think so,” Avi says. He sings another few lines that seem to match Magnus’s humming. He’d been in chorus for a couple of years in school, so singing in front of others doesn’t make him nervous, but even he has to admit that the situation is weird. Singing along to the tune of a stranger and also hoping the stranger doesn’t collapse and die. Robbie is tricky like that, with all his delayed curses to people who knocked into him at a subway station. All those hidden depths Avi had never wanted to know about. Robbie’s got layers. He’s like a rotten onion.

“Holy shit,” Magnus says. “You’re a siren, I knew you were too cool to be human!”

There’s another buzz from his phone, which is good, because Avi doesn’t know how to respond to that.

 

 **taako:**  i’ll be there tomorrow as long as magnus doesnt die youre good

 **avi:**  magnus thinks I'm a siren now. how did he fuck up his magical creatures so bad. what shitty movies do you watch with him

 **taako:**  what's he saying

 

Magnus is staring at him, but his eyes are weirdly unfocused.

“You look like you need some sleep,” Avi remarks.

Magnus shakes himself out of his state of unfocus. “My head hurts so fucking much,” he says. “How does your hair curl like that?” he asks, nodding in the direction of Avi’s hair.

Avi shrugs. “It’s natural.”

“It’s cute,” Magnus mutters, ducking his head.

“Oh, uh—thank you,” Avi responds, flustered.

He notices that Magnus has been eyeing a champagne bottle with a determined look to his eyes.

“How about we call it a night,” Avi offers. “You’re gonna have a wicked hangover in the morning.”

Magnus nods, tries to stand up and crashes onto the floor. Hard.

Avi winces.

 

 **taako:**  tell me the deets did magnus say your eyes were pretty or some stupid shit like that

 

Avi, for the time being, elects not to say anything about their conversation.

 

 **avi:**  he stared off into space and then crashed into the floor… how much of this did he drink?

 **taako:**  eh he's not dead

 **avi:**  I'm gonna take him up bc I think he's gonna break something or start dueling a champagne bottle if he wakes up

 **taako:** what a bro

 **avi:**  what are u implying

 **taako:**  you know ;)

 **avi:**  ??????????

 

“Come on, big guy,” Avi mutters, pulling Magnus off of the floor. “I’ll take you to bed.”

Magnus blinks up at him.

“Oh, come on,” Avi says. “I can’t lift you. Please try to walk.”

Together, they both stumble up the stairs.

“Holy shit,” Magnus whispers, once they reach the second floor. Avi unceremoniously lets him slump to a kneeling position on the floor.

“It’s a magical dog,” Magnus murmurs, almost reverent. He looks up at Avi. “What’s her name?”

“Ah, well,” Avi answers shrugging, “Cerberus was uh, way too fucking obvious. There are lots of three-headed dogs around. Arguably, most three-headed dogs don’t show up and try to set your bed on fire, but like, what can you do? So I named her Nikitha. Most just call her Niki.” He realizes he’s rambling, and bites his lip. “So,” he continues, gesturing weakly towards her, “yeah.”

“Good name for a good dog,” Magnus says. He’s carrying such love and reverence in his voice. It’s hard to not feel like Avi is soaring.

“Don’t think I can sleep,” Magnus mumbles. “Too excited when I look at her.”

Avi side-eyes Nikitha. “Yeah, me too,” he says. “She looks like she wants to jump on you.”

“I wouldn’t mind,” Magnus says.

Avi grimaces. “You say that, until she tries breathing fire in you face.”  
“I’m a tough boy,” Magnus says, a twinkle in his eye. “I never get hurt.”

“Muscles don’t save you from getting burned,” Avi sighs.

“Ooh, but Avi,” Magnus boasts, “the only burns I have are these sick sideburns!”

“Have you jumped into a flamethrower yet?” he asks, and then fears for his life when Magnus’s eyes light up.

“That wasn’t a suggestion,” he adds. They’re almost at the garden. The sweet and cloying smell of flowers almost overwhelms Avi, at first. He grimaces. This is Merle’s space. He doesn't tend to spend long hours here, so the scent is always a little unpleasant.

“Come on, dude,” he mutters, half dragging Magnus to the comfortable niche where Merle almost always falls asleep. For once, he’s glad Merle doesn’t stick to normal dwarf behavior, because the niche is wide and roomy, and fits Magnus perfectly. “Wait here,” he says, and then fetches a blanket, draping it over Magnus.

Magnus blinks sleepily up at him. “Gonna go?” he asks. He frowns in a way that makes Avi hesitate.

 _You always had a thing for strays_ , he hears Taako say, and then banishes the thought. Even if he did, Magnus is Taako’s friend. A friend of a friend is still someone who deserves to have their requests met after being met with a potentially dangerous potion.

“I just have to get some things,” he promises. “I’ll be right back.”

He doesn’t look back when he walks into the library. It’s a large collection of information, with a mix of published books and Lucretia’s scientific journals, and since Robbie always seems to fuck with the worst shit, he grabs Lucretia’s notes. With the books balanced against his side, he grabs his portable potions kit, and heads back towards the garden.

Halfway through his journey towards the greenhouse, Avi realizes just how awful he feels, and immediately takes a detour towards his bathroom, to brush his teeth. He splashes some cold water on his face, thinks  _get it together, you’re responsible for someone’s life, you loser_ , and then picks up his stuff again.

As soon as Magnus sees him walk back into the room, he gives a lazy thumbs up, and then slumps over, dead to the world. And Avi could leave, but it feels weird to break a promise. He figures get used to the smell of flowers all around for a night.

He taps Magnus awake quietly. It’s easy to lift him out of his half-sleep state.

“Do you mind if I take a blood sample?” he asks, and then pauses, wondering how much information he can reveal. “I think you’ve got some toxins in you, and a blood sample will help me with working that out,” he settles on.”

“I don’t mind,” Magnus murmurs. “I trust you.” He groans. “I think the drink is wearing off, because I feel like absolute shit,” he says. “I will sleep it off after you take that sample.”

“Sure,” Avi says, keeping his voice soft, and he works fast.

Of course, working on a cure for a potion that he only vaguely knows the contents of is difficult, and the fact that he finds himself ridiculously tired. He blinks and rests his head on the small free space on his desk. He’s so close to just sleeping right there where he sits, and all he’s done is succeed in making a hangover potion.

 _Someone out there definitely has a better chance of doing this_ , Avi thinks, and he’s about to call it quits when his phone dings.

Fuck.  _It’s 3 A.M. already_ , he notes as he picks up his phone.

 

 **taako:**  you know, magnus has a thing for arms

 **avi** : ???????????

 **avi:**  I am TRYING to sleep

 

He’s an awful liar, and Taako knows it. He sighs, and straightens back up in his seat, rubbing at his eyes.

He’s never been much of anything, but the one thing he takes pride in is his work ethic. It’s one of the reasons he’s gotten Lucretia to trust him. And it’s not something that’s easily noticeable, or anything, but it’s a quiet thing Avi  _knows_ is true. It’s late at night, and Magnus will probably feel worse when he wakes up, and Avi would be horrible if he let him die, or be in that kind of pain, without even trying.

He groans, staring at the bright light of his screen. .

 

 **avi:**  I hate you

 **taako:** wayne gretsky - u miss 100% of the shots u don't take

 **avi:**  you're right. i need a shot. many, in fact

 **taako:**  u will regret it in the afternoon

 **avi:**  fuck you I have a hangover potion, and this time it’s actually perfect. also that sounds like a threat.

 **taako:**  so,, u said u were trying to sleep, huh

 **avi:**  what are you doing up so late

 **taako:**  duh, making fun of ur love life, vino, and seeing u deflect badly

 **avi:**  can you only make alcohol related puns

 **taako:**  for u? yes, u avoider

 **avi:**  you’re limiting your creativity, taako

 

Avi puts his phone away and gets back to work. The scent of the flowers seems to almost fade into the background as he works, eyes stinging from tiredness, frustration, and all of the nightmares that tend to hit you when you’re awake too long. He’s finally finished with an experimental cure a few hours later, and he bottles it carefully, labeling the mixture. It’s an inky black with the slightest silver shine from ground up dragon scales.

This is the part where things could go explosively wrong. So Avi sends a quick prayer to any god that might be around, and then takes a few drops of the vial and drinks it. 

Almost immediately, half the flowers in the garden disappear, and Avi’s head hurts so much he feels like ripping out his skull. He caps the vial and rummages for a green sticker, which he slaps on the top.

His motor skills are quickly failing under the unbearable pain, though, so it’s all he can do to store the vial so it doesn’t roll off the desk before slumping down on the desk. He makes a meager attempt to clean up, which really means stacking the books up and pushing them to the side while his vision swims and his eyes flutter shut every two seconds, rendering him half-blind.

Eventually he just gives up and lays on the table, with all of his stuff pushed away from him. Panic creeps into him, and he really hopes that this potion doesn’t fuck him up permanently. But Avi has made many bad late-night decisions, but testing an experimental cure on himself may be the worst of them. Considering Avi’s preexisting ability, the cure is much more like a poison.

It’s light outside, and sunlight is streaming into the gardens, and it’s so, so bright, and his head hurts, and his eyes hurt, and before he knows it, his eyes flutter closed and he doesn’t open them again.

 

* * *

 

There’s a soft pressure on his shoulder. He wakes up with a yawn, rubbing sleepily at his eyes. Avi swears that he’s never going to pull an all-nighter like that again, but he also knows that he’s lying to himself.

The first thing he recalls is Taako’s skeptical look and his comment about strays. “Taako, I hate you, I’m so fucking transparent, he’s not even a fucking stray but you’re right,” he whines, too quiet and too tired to voice his complaints in anything but a mumble.

He yawns again, and takes notice of the shadow over his desk. He blinks, turning upwards, sees a face that is quickly becoming familiar.

“Oh, it’s you,” he says, relieved that no one else had entered the room while he’d been sleeping. “Hi, Magnus.”

Magnus glances around the room, probably trying to make sense of the wild mess that is Merle’s greenhouse. “Sorry,” he says after a moment. “Who are you?”

“Oh,” Avi says, too stunned to explain. The realization that Magnus has forgotten him hits him like a bullet, and it probably aches more than it should. Then Avi remembers that he has so much more to explain than just who he is, and turns away for a moment to properly wake himself up.

He can’t just leave and splash his face with cold water while screaming, so he settles for second-best and just rubs at his eyes again.

He turns back to face Magnus. Now that he’s actually awake, he’s hit by a stabbing pain in his forehead, and his vision clouds for a short minute. Avi looks around to see nothing around him but a pretty meadow. Now that he’s thinking about it, even without Magnus casting a shadow over him, the world around him just feels darker.

He doesn’t have enough time to worry about that, anyways. He nods to himself and settles the issue for the moment. “You don’t remember,” Avi says, just to confirm, and sees as Magnus imperceptibly nods. “Well,” he continues, deciding to start with only the most basic details of the situation.  “I’m Avi. How are you feeling?”

Magnus grimaces. “Awful. I feel like I chucked a battering ram at Death’s door.”

And this is strange. Avi keeps trying to tell himself that Magnus doesn’t remember, that he should be freaked out, that he’s not drunk anymore, that this is their first meeting—

And Magnus in front of him, and he talks with a smile curling at his lips, with the type of comfortable aura that would put anyone at ease.  _Maybe he’s like this to everybody_ , Avi thinks.  _Even so, it’s nice._

He can’t help it. He laughs. “That is an unpleasant feeling,” he agrees, and as he blinks, his vision shifts back into its normal state. He concentrates, trying to see if he can spark his vision into something of a higher level, but nothing happens. He frowns for a moment, but then remembers that there are more pressing things for now.

He grabs the vial of black liquid from his desk and says, “You’re not going to trust me, but you should drink this. It’ll help with what I assume is your headache and dizzy vision.”

Magnus flinches, but not away from the vial. He then stares at it for a few seconds before shrugging. “Well, hand it over,” he says, and so Avi does.

Their hands brush as Magnus takes the vial in his hands, and it’s nothing electric, but it’s… something.

He keeps waiting for the other shoe to drop. For Magnus to suddenly declare he’s terrified of everything, or try to run away, or call him a monster, or start talking with a ridiculously formal tone. Any option is likely and possible,

But Magnus doesn’t do anything of the sort. He downs the vial with ease, and Avi watches as the magic spreads through him, clearing the poison in his blood. It bursts through his eyes with a sharp flash of lightning, and when Magnus opens his eyes and looks around, he seems to be significantly calmer.

Avi waits for Magnus to get reacquainted with his surroundings. It’s not like he can find any secrets, considering he can’t see past the glamours anymore.

“Are those… Nicholas Sparks novels?” Magnus asks after a beat, squinting at Avi’s potions journal.

He laughs.  _Thank goodness it worked_ , he thinks. Then he thinks _, wait, do people on the street think I constantly carry Nicholas Sparks novels around with me?_

“No,” he manages to say, trying to hold back his laughter. “It’s. Um. It’s a glamour, but Taako should probably introduce you to the whole thing before I go too much into detail.”

“You know Taako?” Magnus asks.

Avi nods. “Yeah, we’re friends,” he says.

Magnus tilts his head, looking thoughtful.. “So, basically, all I know now,” he says, “is that my life is lie?”

He’s not wrong, and Avi could probably tell him he’s wrong, but lying to Magnus feels pretty unethical, and the way that things are going, Avi’s pretty sure Magnus will just get inoculated into the Bureau of Balance. Taako’s already a member, so he’d probably vouch for that as well.

“What you’re seeing now is an illusion,” Avi replies. “Humans aren’t supposed to see any of this. The thing you drank last night messed with your head and basically dispelled the glamours for you, making you able to see everything.”

“Ah, so I am right,” Magnus says. “Everything is a lie.”

Avi shrugs. “It’s an agreed upon thing. Live in the world of humans, live by their rules.” He doesn’t mention that he’s the exception to both, because it sounds a little too much like bragging and little too much for a beginner’s explanation to the new world Magnus will have to understand. 

Magnus frowns. “Seems hard.”

“It’s not a hard price to pay,” Avi says, “but all of that explanation will come later. Anything you want to know specifically?”

“Uh, well, I feel like I should ask about all the fantastical stuff, but since you’re leaving that to Taako… did I say anything dumb last night?”

Magnus smiles, and the greenhouse feels warmer than usual. “I don’t, um, remember much, so I feel like I might have done something weird,” he says.

“The list is too long,” Avi says, completely deadpan, and then he smiles two seconds later, unable to stay stoic. He laughs to himself. “Uh, lots of things. I don’t know if you think it’s as weird as I th—”

Magnus sighs. “Spare me the fluff and just tell me all the stupid shit I did,” he says.

Avi bites his lip, making tentative eye contact. Magnus doesn’t look away. Avi sighs.

“Okay,” he says, “so first, you tripped into my arms while saying you were going to sit down on an imaginary chair, and then you called me a siren after I sang 3 lines of that, uh, that one really popular song? Call Me Maybe? And—”

“ _You can stop now_ ,” Magnus half-shouts. His face is turning a brilliant red color. “I feel like I need to apologize for everything,” Magnus mutters in a low voice, staring up at the ceiling. “Did I do anything else that embarrassing?”

Avi snorts.  _All of this is embarrassing_ , he doesn’t say.  _For you and me both._

He’s thinking about Magnus last night, and his lazy smile, and his sheer excitement over seeing Nikitha, and he laughs.

“Well,” Avi says.

“Well?” Magnus asks.

“Well,” Avi says as fast as he can, “I told you that you didn’t want to get burned by my hellhound, and then you yelled ‘but I have sick sideburns!’ or something along the lines of that.”

Magnus makes a noise that sounds vaguely like he’s dying. “Oh my god,” he murmurs, staring at him with wide eyes. “I said that?”                                                           

Avi smiles, and his vision bursts into fireworks. The room is suddenly illuminated with magic, as it flows off from the flowers of Merle’s plants. Avi doesn’t sigh in relief, but it feels like a weight’s been lifted off his shoulder.

“Oh my god,” Magnus exclaims. “You’re the person with pretty eyes!”

Avi has to look away before he starts laughing, but he can’t help the giddy smile that creeps up on his face. He knows Magnus doesn’t remember, but—

It’s nice to know that even not drink out of his mind, he still says these things.

“I—” Magnus begins. 

“You said that out loud,” Avi confirms.

Magnus groans. “Just. Turn me into a fish. Fuck.” With feeling, he mutters, “I’ve done so much shit.”

Avi shrugs. He’s unsure how to tell Magnus that he actually enjoyed their meeting yesterday, and instead settles on, “At least you’re not dead.”

“I am dying a different kind of death right now,” Magnus informs him. “Of embarrassment.”

“Consequences of prolonged contact with Robbie,” Avi says, mood quickly darkening. “Speaking of which, I need to talk with him.”

“What are you going to tell him?” Magnus asks.

“Well,” Avi says, counting off on his fingers, “first, I will tell him not to fuck with me. Second, I will sock him in the face. Third, I’ll rob his house full of illegal possessions. Fourth, I’ll throw him into prison.”

And that sounds so much more dangerous than it should be, but sometimes Avi just really loves the rush.  _Being so patient and kind all the time doesn’t suit me_ , he thinks.  _I’ve just got an inkling for fighting._

He grins and asks, “What do you think?”           

Magnus frowns almost immediately. “Doesn’t sound fun,” he says.

Avi sighs, unsure how to concisely sum up all the fucked-up things Robbie has done. “Trust me, he deserves it.”

“Yeah, probably,” Magnus says with a shrug. “I’m just… having trouble comprehending all of this. It’s a lot of information, you know?”

Avi tries his best to look reassuring, but he’s pretty sure it just comes off as extremely worried. “Yeah, it is,” he admits. His lips press into a thin line.  _We’ll have to inoculate soon_ , Avi reminds himself.  _Might as well be as truthful as possible._   “Are you doing okay inside of here? It’s not messing with your head or anything?” he asks, peering up at Magnus.

Magnus grins—soft, sweet, natural—and Avi feels that his refreshing mood is infectious. “I mean, I have a feeling half of what I’m seeing is fake, because this garden looks really normal, but my head is fine. Why?”

 _Right_ , Avi hurriedly screams inside his head. _Explanations. You can be amazed by him later._ “The glamours and enchantments on this place are extremely strong. It’s supposed to ward off humans, so I think prolonged exposure might hurt you.”

Magnus laughs, and it makes something warm flutter in Avi’s chest. “Then I don’t think I’m too excited to stick around.”

Avi doesn’t know how to hold his joy, doesn’t know how to look cool at all, and probably stares at Magnus’s face for longer than necessary, but the least he can do is help Magnus out.

He rises from his seat. “Come on,” he says. “Taako has been worried sick. You should probably get back to your apartment.”

“Are—are you going to come?” Magnus asks. He sounds almost hopeful.

“Of course,” Avi says with a nod, still reeling from the sincerity in Magnus’s voice. With a smirk, he adds, “I’ve got to arrest Robbie, don’t I?”

“And three other things before that,” Magnus says.  _He’s grinning,_  Avi thinks.  _Good._  

“And,” Avi continues, because he doesn’t have anything to lose, “It would be pretty awful if I just kicked you out. So I’m going to walk you back, first.”

Magnus grins. “That would be—nice.”

Avi smiles right back at him. His joy feels like it is spilling out from him in a flood. “Well. I am nice.”

He glances around the room and takes a deep breath. Then the magic in the room bursts into color again. He takes a quick survey to make sure nothing is amiss.

“You’re free to wait here or downstairs,” Avi tells Magnus. “I’ll be ready in a few minutes.”

Magnus is smiling at him. There is light in his eyes.

 _Ah_ , Avi thinks.  _This is going to be good. Really, really good._

 

* * *

 

 **avi:**  hey does everybody else know abt magnus?

 **taako:**  yeah theyre all huddled up at our apartment like a bunch of losers

 **avi:** we might have to do a sudden inoculation today so get ready for that

 **taako:**  lmao its ok lucretia has wanted to recruit mags ever since she found out he wields an axe

 **avi:**  really? I didn’t know

 **avi:** has everyone else… already met magnus?

 **taako:**  would u be mad if i said yes

 **avi:** uh. no?

 **taako:**  then yes

 **taako:**  lucretia and krav actually havent like interacted with him tho

 **avi:**  I mean, I don’t get outside that often. so it’s not surprising that we haven’t met.

 **taako:**  boo stop being sad and get mags over here

 

 **vodka:**  should be at taakos apartment in 10

 **vodka:**  might be doing an inoculation

 **ladyflame:**  hell yeah should i set something on fire for the whole magic is real speech?

 **Xtreme teen bible:** word in the grapevine is that Magnus slept in the rosebed. What the fuck. I trusted you Avi?

 **vodka:**  don’t worry your plants are fine

 **vodka:**  also lup he already knows about magic I’ll explain in person later

 **Xtreme teen bible:** If any of them tell me you hurt them you’re dead. Just wait till I talk to them.

 **vodka:**...ok?

 **ladyflame:**  yknow merle is such a bad cleric that hes probably really good at murder. avi ur gonna have to watch ur back

 **taakolicious:** yo give mags the phone i need to ask him something

 **vodka:**  hey taako!!! - magnus

 **taakolicious:**  you like raspberry yeah

 **vodka:**  yeah!!

 **taakolicious:**  aw nice

 **ladyflame:**  hey what’s up mags

 **vodka:**  oh hey lup! is magic the reason you almost burned down your house last week?

 **ladyflame:**  no way that was barry investigating the methods of a satanic cult and being clumsy as fuck

 **ladyflame:**  i am way too cool to mess up like that

 **vodka:**  so barry does this whole magic thing too?

 **taakolicious:**  why else would his jeans actually be comfortable, dude

 **vodka:**  so do merle’s plants actually talk to him?

 **taakolicious** : no

 **ladyflame:**  no

 **Xtreme teen bible:** Of course!

 **ladyflame:** he’s lying

 **taakolicious:** literally no one else has heard his plants talk.

 **Xtreme teen bible:** what about Audrey 2???

 **taakolicious:** _mistake_

 **taakolicious:** that was pringles and thats why it tried to murder everybody

 **ladyflame:** how the fuck can you call audrey 2 a plant it was an eldritch demon

 **taakolicious:** god imagine if krav hadnt been there

 **ladyflame:** u really love talking about your bf huh

 **taakolicious:** because hes amazing lup,, how can i not talk abt this gorgeous man

 **taakolicious:** literally tho thank god that krav is a dumb musical nerd who literally killed audrey 2 on sight after finding out about the name

 **vodka:**  ok but!! little shop of horrors is a good musical!!!

 **taakolicious:**  yeah mags sure,, u havent even seen krav as a skeleton yet what do u know

 **vodka:**  WHAT

 

“We’re here,” Avi says, tapping Magnus on the shoulder.

He fumbles with the phone in surprise, before handing it over to Avi with a nervous laugh.

“Uh,” he says, smiles, and Avi laughs.

“I’m not going to ask what they told you,” Avi says, smiling. “Unless you wanted to tell me, of course.”

“Taako’s boyfriend is a skeleton?” Magnus asks, nervous laughter flooding into his voice. “And I think Barry’s jeans are… magic?”

Avi snorts. “No, definitely not,” he assures, sees Magnus’s shoulders relax, and then quickly adds, “but Kravitz actually  _is_  a skeleton. Sometimes. And Taako hasn;t asked Kravitz out on a date yet.”

“Oh,” Magnus says. “That’s, well. Wild.”

“Things are about to get a lot wilder,” Avi says, trying to sound reassuring. He pauses for a moment, decides  _screw it_ , and then amends his comment. “Actually, that’s an understatement. A lot of fundamental science is going to be thrown into the trash.”

Magnus shrugs. Avi glances back at him. He seems nervous, and apprehensive, but anything but afraid. Maybe it speaks to just how much Magnus trusts his friends.

Avi smiles. “I think you already know you’ll be in good hands, though,” he adds, and Magnus ducks his head, not meeting his eyes.

“I guess so,” he murmurs.

Avi’s hand stops on the doorbell.  _You’re getting embarrassed now?_  he doesn’t say.

Instead, he breathes deep, turns around, and extends a hand towards Magnus. He smiles as bright as he can, trying to mirror the way Magnus just seems to make people relax around him. “I think we should do a proper introduction first,” he says.

Magnus looks up at him, looks at his hand, smiles, and takes it. “Hi,” he says. “I’m Magnus Burnsides. I’m as human as they come. It’s nice to meet you.”

Avi grins, and responds in kind. “Hi. I’m Avinash Lanka. I’m almost as human as they come. It’s been nice meeting you twice.”

They shake hands, Magnus flushing from embarrassment, and Avi can’t help the silly smile that seems to just bloom out of him.

 _No flowery thoughts,_ he tries to think.  _Can’t be like Merle._

He keeps smiling anyways. Keeps thinking that it’s been an honor to meet Magnus.   
The door swings open before Avi can even turn back around.

“Get in, losers, we’re inoculating!” Lup shouts, and she’s grinning.

Avi shrugs and steps inside, knowing full well that Lup has never watched Mean Girls. Magnus follows.

 

* * *

 

Magnus makes it about two steps into the entrance of his apartment before Taako ambushes him.

Avi just shoots him a quick smile before stepping into Taako’s living room, figuring that it isn’t really his place to be there.

He runs into Lucretia almost immediately.   
A run-in might be the wrong word to describe it. What really happens is that when he walks in, Lucretia is sitting right next to the entrance, doodling on her journal, and caught by surprise, he freezes at the entrance. She smiles at him when he comes in. “I’ve been waiting for you,” she says.

Avi swallows. “Madame Director, it’s nice to see you.”

“Nice to see you as well,” Lucretia says. “Congrats on the new recruit.”

He laughs. “I guess it’s a happy accident, then?” 

He eyes shine with good humor. “You’ll take good care of him, yes?”

“I’ll do the best I can,” he promises, and for once, it doesn’t feel like he’s preaching to empty air.

“Magnus is a good person,” Lucretia says. “He deserves good people around him.”

“Yeah,” Avi says, unsure how to interpret that. Is it a threat? Is it a compliment? For some reason, both answers leave his throat feeling tight.

She narrows her eyes at him, and Avi finds it hard to not turn away from her piercing gaze. “How did you manage yesterday?”

“Well, he’s all fixed up,” Avi says. “I mixed up a potion with a couple of ingredients, and wrote down the contents just in case. I also happened upon a much better hangover potion.”

“That’s good,” Lucretia says. “Meticulous in your work as usual, Avi.”

He can’t stop the swell of pride he feels with those words. It’s hard to explain the complicated dynamics of last night, but knowing that he did good enough under the time constraints makes him feel much better, even if he doesn’t understand anything.

“So,” Avi adds, unsure of how to reply to the compliment and deciding instead to just never mention it, “I figure I’ll wait here a bit, and then go out and track down Robbie.”

Lucretia nods with approval. “I’ll arrange a team,” she says, and Avi makes a frantic motion with his hands, signifying a clear negative.

“I’m not going to make someone miss Magnus’s inoculation. That would be awful of me.”

“And you’re going to miss it?” Lucretia asks.

“If Robbie can do what he did again, he’s dangerous,” Avi says. Doesn’t say that he feels like he’s already seen Magnus’s first inoculation, and somehow, the thought of seeing it twice hurts, even if they are radically different instances. “The quicker I get him locked up, the safer we all are.”

Lucretia smiles. “So you’re doing this for Magnus?” she asks.

Avi thanks every star in heaven for the fact that when he blushes, it’s impossible to see.

Lucretia’s eyes light up. “You two seem to get along well,” she says.

“Uh—no. No,” he finally answers. “ _Wait_ —yes! Yes, we get along well, no to the first thing.” He pauses. “You haven’t even seen us!” he protests.

She grins up at him and taps the side of her head. “I’m smart enough to know.”

 _Yeah_ , Avi doesn’t reply,  _but somehow not smart enough to realize I’m a fraud._

 “Avi, you can keep working just as hard as you usually do,” Lucretia says, and stands up.

At this height, she’s still shorter than Avi, but it’s hard not to feel intimidated by her presence. She’s not much older than him, but she has magic knowledge spanning libraries, and has somehow managed to assemble some of the most talented people around. She even managed to find him, alone and terrified. Avi still feels like he should be repaying her for all of her hard work, rather than being paid for a gift he’s had since birth.

“How much have you told Magnus?” she asks.

Avi shrugs. “Basics.” He doesn’t elaborate, but also doesn’t know how to leave. They stand there in awkward silence, before Lucretia finally opens her mouth.

“A—“

“More importantly!” Merle cuts in, swatting at Avi’s arm. “How are my  _fucking_  plants, Avi?”

“They’re doing just fine,” Avi assures.

Merle crosses his arms. “Don’t let Magnus get near them,” he grumbles. “He’ll trample over everything.”

“Sure,” Avi agrees.

“One day,” Merle proclaims, “I’m going to steal your house, Avi.”

“It’s the base,” Avi reminds him. “I just happen to live there.”

“As if,” Merle scoffs. “If the base is the house, then I guess it’s just your base.”

Avi smiles. “Don’t you own the entire garden there?” he asks.

Merle rolls his eyes. “It’s not like all my garden exploits are solely in that garden,” he drawls. “It’s more for your potion-making than anything else.”

Avi frowns. “It’s for  _your_  potion making,” he argues.

“Which I have neither the time nor patience to do,” Merle says. “So I guess it’s yours now.”

“…Alright,” Avi says, sighing. He hopes that this doesn’t become official, because he’s not really feeling great about extra work, even if it does occupy his time.

He glances around the room and spots Carey on the couch, tapping away at a 3DS. He makes a beeline towards her, ignoring the strange muttering Merle’s words have devolved into.

“Hey,” he greets, flopping down on the seat next to her. “Where’s Killian?”

Carey laughs, not moving her eyes away from the screen. She taps through the last few seconds of her rhythm game before snapping her 3DS shut.

“I’m not always with Killian,” Carey complains. “It’s not like I have a tracker on her. Don’t assume, Avi.”

Avi smiles. “I don’t know,” he says. “You’re almost always with her, except when we’re in the training hall.”

“That’s fair,” Carey relents. She grins. “I mean, if I’m not with Killian, I’m with you, and since you’re right here, it’s not odd at all, is it?”

Warmth seems to spread through him. “Yeah, I guess you’re right,” he says.

“Oh!” Carey says, snapping her fingers. “That’s right. I forgot to tell you. We’re doing our classic induction ceremony.”

Avi freezes where he is. “So,” he says, hesitant, “I have to…”

“Get the knife,” Carey fills in for him. “Well. There you go. Run along. I think Killian is there, too.”

“So you do know where Killian is!”

Carey grins and waves him off.

When Avi enters the kitchen, Taako’s macarons have just finished off. Taako’s pulling them out and assembling them with delicacy like always.

“You here to grab the knife?” Taako asks, and Avi nods. “Sweet,” Taako continues, motioning to a knife set in the corner. “Top left, can’t miss it.”

The weight is uncomfortable on his hands. He holds it carefully, not close enough to his body, not so far out that he might stab someone.

Killian comes in from the pantry and waves at him with cheer. He waves back, only to see her eyes widen.  _Fuck_ , Avi thinks,  _that’s the hand holding the knife._  He brings it back down.

“You want to hang out here?” Taako says. “Or are you going to sit down and contemplate your existence?”

Avi laughs. “And are you gonna ask Kravitz out?”

Taako grins. “That’s—well, that’s already happened, my dude. A little late to the party there.”

“No way—when?” Avi asks, grinning.

“Oh, you know,” Taako says, waving it off. “It turned out he had like, a big crush on me, or something.”

Avi snorts. “Yeah, anyone could see that,” he says.

“It’s still hard to take that first step,” Taako says. “Nothing is ever really certain, you know?”

“True.”

“Anyways,” Taako says with a dangerous glint in his eyes, “what do you think about Magnus?”

“He’s great,” Avi says, and then ducks his head in embarrassment. “I guess I wish I could have met him under different circumstances, though.”

Taako nods approvingly. “I have a feeling you two will get along,” he says. “Magnus really likes you.”

“You don’t know that, you haven’t even talked to him about everything yet,” Avi mutters, but he can’t stop the giddy feelings those words give him.

“I know him well enough,” Taako replies, and that’s that. Avi is probably way too happy about this, but he’s allowed to be, since chance encounters like Magnus are rare. Humans aren’t often inducted into the Bureau of Balance, after all.

“Speaking of Magnus, he’s probably going to be out any minute now, so I’m going to run interference,” Taako says. “You settle yourself down with that knife and scare him properly.”

“This seems a little mean,” Avi says.

Taako shrugs. “Tradition.”

Avi sighs, and makes his way back to the living room.

True to his word, Taako brings Magnus into the room less than a minute after he’s settled down on the couch. They’ve already fallen into an easy and amiable sort of chatter as Taako drags him into the center of the living room. Once Magnus is there, Taako holds his hands out in front of him, palms up.

“Red pill or blue pill?” Taako asks, holding absolutely nothing but air in his palms.

“Am I allowed to ask what the red pill is?” Magnus asks.

“Technically, no,” Avi says from where he’s leaning on the couch, smiling. Hopefully Magnus doesn’t catch on to what’s about to happen. Hopefully he does, because Avi doesn’t actually want to scare him.

Avi sighs, focuses back on the topic at hand, and says, “There’s a lot… of magic in the world. Do you want to see it, or not?”

Magnus bites his lip. “If I see it, am I gonna die?”

Avi’s hand grips the handle off the knife a little tighter.

Taako frowns. “What?”

“I feel like being a human is, well, going to get me killed,” Magnus explains. “Especially since you guys seem to be part of a secret society.”

“I am the greatest fucking transmutation wizard in the world,” Taako says. “Trust me, you’ll be fine.”

Avi instantly feels assured by the confidence in his voice. A lot of people would pass over Taako’s words as false bravado, but Taako really is that good.

Magnus raises an eyebrow. “Are you as good as transmutation as you are at cooking?”

Taako grins. “Fuck yeah!”

And then Magnus smiles. “Red pill.”

Taako huffs. “As if there was ever a choice.”

As quick as a flash, Taako’s eyes dart towards him. Avi grins and taps on the handle of the knife.

Because Taako is always dramatic, he pauses for an abnormal amount of time before saying, “Oh, by the way, you’re going to need to drink Avi’s blood, so buckle up. A good macaron will get rid of the aftertaste.”

Magnus blinks. “Sorry,  _what_?”

Avi pulls out his knife with a sigh.  _Time to get this over with._  “Yep.”

 

* * *

 

It takes about five seconds for all hell to break loose. Magnus glances around the room in wild fright, begging for it to be a joke, and Avi tries not to smile.

He also tries not to drop the knife. That would be unfortunate.

It also takes about five seconds for Lucretia to burst out laughing. It stuns the room into silence, for a few moments. Avi thinks that their Madame Director has a very nice laugh. And it’s nice, that she’s showing that to Magnus. He might look like he wants to dive into an underground tunnel and never see anyone else, again but she’s grinning at him like the sun has just come out.

She finally regains control of her breathing, and shoots a confident, easy smile at Magnus’s horrified face. “Don’t worry,” she says. “Avi’s not going to cut his hand open so you can drink from it.”

“Oh, come on!” Merle whines. “I was going to keep messing with him for a while.”

Magnus manages a shaky smile. “Great,” he says. “But, uh, do I…”

“Yes, Magnus,” Lucretia says. “Unfortunately, the blood drinking is necessary. But really, you’ll only need a little drop.”

Magnus’s face twists into a disgusted expression. He doesn’t say anything about it, though. He just stares at Avi with a perplexed look on his face.

“It’s magical and it happens only once. Trust me, it’ll be over before you know it,” Avi says, trying not to acknowledge that Magnus is staring at him. Everything must be freaking him out, Avi thinks. He hopes he doesn’t sound strange, though he’s probably already failed on that account.

He sighs. “Lucretia, you’ll do the honors, right?”

She nods and says, “Everything will be taken care of, Magnus.”

Magnus sighs. “All right,” he says. “I’m sure that the world is so much freakier than this, anyways.”

“Nah, our boy Avi is just weird,” Taako cuts in.

Avi glares at him. “Well,” he says, a little louder than necessary. “I’ll be off.”

There’s some disinterested waving and goodbyes, except for Magnus, who shouts, “Wait! Why?”

Avi forces a smile. “It would be strange to see you drink my blood,” he lies. He grabs his jacket from the coat rack. “Besides, I have work.”

Magnus frowns. “Okay,” he says, and Avi leaves, trying not to think too hard about anything.

He doesn’t know why it’s getting to him. Magnus just… gets along with everyone, and he makes everything brighter. And Avi’s chill, he gets along well with all his coworkers, but he’s not…

He’s not like that. Doesn’t know how to immediately fill a room with sunlight. Only knows how to offer a drink and listen as best as he can. Maybe, if he’s lucky, he can approximate two-thirds of a solution.

He shrugs on his jacket and tries to shrug the rest of it off. It’s not really worth it to agonize over things like this. He hums aimlessly.

“Hey,” Taako says, and Avi pauses. “You—uh, you gonna keep that knife?”

“Sure,” Avi agrees. “Thanks.”

“That—that was not a suggestion, dude, that was a holy shit what are you doing question?”

Avi is already out the door.

Now that he’s thinking about it, and already failing at trying to just stay chill, Avi wonders if he’s bad at saying goodbye. He’s not sure… what one does when they make an exit. Do they promise to see each other again? Avi already knows that he’ll see them again. Does he thank the person for hosting? That would just be awkward, considering how much he hangs out around them.

Maybe a goodbye is a good start.

But that feels ugly, too. It feels like he’s doing something wrong when he says it. More specifically, it feels like after he says that, he’ll walk out and never see the other person again.

He sighs. “Alright,” he says, stopping in the middle of a mostly vacant street. Then he closes his eyes.

A moment later, he opens them, and the world is in sharp focus. The streets glitter soft gold from the sun, and he waves at the fairy passing by.

“Oh, hello, Avi,” she whispers. “Nice to see you again.”

“Hummingbird again?” he asks.

“You guessed right!” she says.

“It’s not like you ever do anything else,” Avi says.

“Ah, well, I can’t help it,” she says with a fluttery laugh. “You know, they’re just so pretty and everything.”

He smiles at her. “I think hummingbirds are pretty cool, yeah.”

He strolls down the cobblestone path, feeling for parts of illusions in the city; through his eyes, they all accumulate like shadows. It doesn’t take long for his eyes to latch onto the darkness in the corner of his eyes. Avi walks into the town park, following his gut, and to his surprise, the shadows around his vision increase. He wanders around the park for a while, and after a couple of minutes, he happens upon the top of a small hill.

Relief washes over him.  _This is the end_ , he thinks. He almost daydreams about how much nicer his life will be, with Robbie gone, and Magnus now here, but quickly focuses back on the task at hand.  

He drops to his hands and knees, and sweeps his fingers across the grass. It is soft, and still wet. The smell of spring rain is oddly pleasant, after having spent all of last night stuck between old pages and potions.  _It’s nice when things are meant to be_ , Avi thinks, just as his fingers glide across a glassy surface.

“Get fucked!” he whispers into the early morning, and kicks the trapdoor in.

He drops down into the room below.

It’s dark and musty. Avi breaks into a coughing fit as soon as he enters. The dim light from above brings some semblance of comfort, at least. He takes a moment to survey his surroundings.

He’s in a room full of books. It’s damp, which is probably why the paper’s on the desk to the corner are all yellowed and breaking apart. Avi approaches the shelves that line the side, breathing slowly.

The air is thick with dark magic. It feels like he’s wading through black slime. Avi taps the knife against a book, checking for any traps, but there seem to be none.

He coughs again. His vision swims, just a little.

 _Alright_ , he thinks.  _Focus, focus._

He closes his eyes.

He can still remember this. All he has to do is think back two years.

 _The sun is not far from here_ , he reminds himself.  _Even the littlest light will allow you to see. And if you have no light, you make your own._

It is his mother’s mantra, and as much as the words hurt, just thinking them makes him feel reassured. For a moment he almost feels as if they are by his side.

He opens his eyes. There’s a room past this one. It feels much, much darker.

Avi hesitates. He grips the knife, and does a slow turn around the room he’s in. The weight fits comfortably in his palm again.

The papers on the desk are fake.

Second shelf, fourth book from the left.  _There_. It’s been shifted recently.

Avi doesn’t flinch. He stabs his knife right in the space between the fourth and fifth book. A soft red glow emanates from it, bubbling like lava. It calls to him like sweet sugar in a soft voice that echoes around his ears.

 _Dark magic_ , Avi thinks, and smiles.

“Sorry,” he says. “I don’t like sweet things.” Then he draws the knife back and cuts the book in half. It bursts in a shower of sparks, and he jumps back as flickering white guard raising itself up around him. The crescent moon hanging from his neck glows. He places his palm over the cold steel in thanks. Lucretia protects him, even now.  

The book, its two halves on the ground, is open now to a page about the human composition. The dark in the other room grows more oppressive. Avi clutches at his chest. He does not dare think or speak his assumption, lest he wishes to invoke them.

 _Oh_ , he realizes belatedly, shifting his hand from the necklace to his heart. It is beating too fast.

He breathes deep, tries not to let the foreboding sense ahead scare him, and taps his Stone of Farspeech.  _Lup will probably answer fastest_ , he decides, and dials out her pattern.

It buzzes with an ugly static sound before he hears a voice on the other end. “Is this—uh—I hope I’m doing this—”

The voice he hears on the other end is nothing like Lup’s. It’s much deeper, hesitant and awkward, and sweet, and—

“Magnus?”

“Avi? Avi! Avi, is that you?”

“Uh, yeah,” he says. “Why do you—”

“Lup said she had a telephone from the Stone Age,” Magnus says, and snorts. “She’s not wrong about that. Why do you guys still use this if you all have phones?”

“Cell service reasons,” Avi answers, too caught off guard to say anything else.

 _Magnus’s voice is bright and sunny_ , Avi thinks.  _It’s nice._

“So… you have Lup’s Stone of Farspeech now?” Avi asks. “Are they, uh, gonna give you your own?”

“Yep!” Magnus says, and Avi smiles.

“That’s nice.”

“Oh, right,” Magnus says. “Why were you calling Lup, anyways? They related to cell service reasons?”

“Oh... uh! Yes,” Avi says hurriedly, flushing. He  _cannot_  be getting distracted in a strange underground cave. Not by Magnus, not by anyone. “I mean, I guess it’s sort of related to that,” Avi says. “But—just give it to her, would you?”

He hears faint laughter and background noise from the phone.

“And I’m sorry for, like, bothering,” Avi says. “I didn’t mean to interrupt anything.”

“It’s alright!” Magnus says. “I mean, it would have been cooler if you were actually here, but you’ve got work, right?”

“You really mean that?” Avi asks, before he can stop himself.

Magnus laughs. “You’re great, Avi.”

“Uh, thanks,” Avi says. He bites his lip. “I might be stealing some of your friends away for a bit, though.”

“They’re your friends too,” Magnus says. “Also, maybe if I beg they’ll let me come along with them so I can see all the cool magic shit you get up to.”

Avi laughs. “I doubt they’ll let you come along,” he says, glancing around. “Not—not on this one. Maybe another time, though?”

“Avi,” Magnus says in an anticipatory voice, drawing out the sound of his name with obvious glee, “is that a promise?”

“N-no—yes?” Avi says, with a laugh. “If—if you want to.”

He can hear Magnus grin on the other side. “Of course I want to fucking go see some cool magic! What you just said is a legally binding contract, so don’t even think about backing out!”

“Right, of course,” Avi says. He smiles, thinking about what to say next, and then breaks out coughing.

“Avi, you okay over there?” Magnus asks.

Avi makes a noise of confirmation. “Just—just get Lup,” he says, with a sigh. There’s silence for a moment, and then he hears footsteps.

He breaks out into a coughing fit again. It has to be something with the air in here. Despite the opening from above, it still feels like no one has been in here for years. The air quality is so horrific that a candle wouldn’t dare light itself here. Avi wonders what kind of crazy person would bother living in this type of hideout.

 _Well, Robbie would_ , he thinks, crouching down to the ground as he waits for Magnus to return with Lup. He picks up the broken pieces of the trapdoor, brushing aside all the debris to reveal lettering on the rotting wood board, intermingled with some suspicious and almost definitely illegal magical symbols.

Fuck. He feels like he’s going to be sick.

Avi lets out a long breath. Maybe he is sick, actually. That would explain why everything suddenly feels so hot all of a sudden. His hands feel like he’s burning.

“Avi? What’s up?”

The sooner this is over, the better. “Could you, Barry, and Kravitz get over to the park? There’s a… situation.”

Lup tsks. “Magnus made this sound casual, and you sound like you’re dying.” She pauses. “You’re not dying, are you?” she demands.

Avi laughs. “Never,” he says. “Not on your watch.”

“Cool,” Lup says, “Unfortunately, I still owe you ten fucking dollars.”

“Guess you’ll just have to pay, then, if I stay alive,” Avi says. He smiles.

“Guess I will,” Lup says.

“Alright,” Avi says. “We’ll keep in touch.”

“Get that demon out of your mouth, first,” Lup says. “Your voice sounds awful.”

“It’s the dust,” Avi says. His hands feel really, really warm. “Maybe the dark magic, too.” Avi concludes. “That always makes it harder to breathe.”

“The park, right?” Lup says, urgent. “Which hill?”

Avi rattles off a description for her, and the Stone of Farspeech clicks off.

He already knows that Lup will burn the place down. Even Barry wouldn’t be interested in things this… macabre.

Avi glares hard at the room in front of him, and a pinprick of light appears in front of him.

 _I have the sun behind my back_ , he thinks.  _The magic circle will not touch me._

He marches into the next room, stretches his hands out, and they’re hot, and they burn when he brings them too close to his chest, but they’re glowing, and as his head aches, the room around him grows brighter and brighter until the colors around him swim into shades of red, brown, and orange before bursting into white.

Avi startles at the sudden bang that comes with the color switch, immediately ducking to the ground with his eyes squeezed shut. When he opens his eyes, in front of him is Robbie, sitting in a perfectly out-of-place office rolling chair. The dust is all that remains of the darkness.

“Nice to see you again,” Robbie says. “I trust you enjoyed my gift?” He grins.

Avi spits out blood. His mouth tastes like steel, but he ignores the discomfort. He’s feeling like he’s burning and he’s sweating because it’s humid and awful, but Robbie is right in front of him, cradling a human arm. Some things are much more important.

He forces himself up into an upright position. “I never enjoy anything you do,” he says.

Robbie shrugs it off, spins in his chair, grabs a Pringles can from the desk, which only holds the can, a pencil, and one book. He pops the cap open with his chipped, bitten down fingernails, and the cap hits Avi’s shoulder.

“I really liked it when you were shorter than me,” Robbie says. “As in, on the floor, dying.” He then smiles. “But you’re still dying, so I guess this is alright.”

“A little dark magic?” Avi says, with a grin. “It could never hurt me, and you know that.”

“Not bad enough,” Robbie says, eyes darkening into an inky, emotionless black. “I could never hurt you enough.”

“Yeah,” Avi says, stretching. “I could never get enough of your goddamn villain speeches.”

Robbie smiles and shakes the Pringles can. “You—”

Avi reels back and socks him in the face. There’s a buzz by his chest. The trio has arrived. He breathes deep and locks himself into focus.

There’s blood dripping on the metal handles of the rolling chair. Robbie reaches for a small purple-black vial on the desk. Avi jumps on him, stabbing the knife in the book by Robbie’s hand, before grappling with him for the vial. It bursts into sparks just like the last one, shaking them and throwing them into a spiral. They tumble off the chair and hit the ground quick, and it’s only a matter of seconds before Avi wrestles the vial out of Robbie’s grip. He pins him on the ground there, hands on the neck.

“Don’t fuck with me,” he hisses. “You’re not good enough to do that.”

“This spoiled prince,” Robbie sneers. “You think you’ll always get what you want?”

“No,” Avi says, gritting his teeth, unsure of how to deal with the emotional complexities that come across with Robbie’s words. “But you sure as hell won’t win.”

The papers of the book fly around the room in circles. Avi sees flashes of half-deformed creatures, sketches of the human body, formulas about magic components, and snatches a paper out of the air.

“Permanent transfiguration is illegal,” Avi says, trying to not let his voice tremble. “Because it doesn’t  _work_.”

“And you would know,” Robbie says. “You, with your special blood and all your exceptions? You think you would  _know_?”

Avi crumples the paper up. He wants to set it on fire. Settling for second best, he taps the Stone of Farspeech. “Lup!” he shouts. “Burn it down!”

“On it!” he hears, and there’s a blaze of heat in the air. The fire does not enter the room they are both in.   
“There’s a block in front of your door!” she yells. “Avi, you in there?”

“Yep,” he says, and grabs Robbie by the collar. “I’m gonna drag him out.”

“I can’t see shit,” Lup says.

Avi frowns. The room around him is brightly lit. He concentrates. “Hang on,” he says.

The hand that holds the black vial presses against the wood of the wall in a certain pattern, and the walls crumble, revealing a room that is nothing but white nothingness.

“Nice aesthetic change,” Avi says, glancing down at Robbie, who scowls. A weight hits him from the side, and Avi crashes into the wall. He bites his tongue, trying not to cry out. Robbie smashes the black vial against both their hands. The glass digs into his fingers, and blood runs down the walls, along with the black liquid.

“If I”m going down, you’re going down with me.”

Avi kicks at his knees, but Robbie just side steps them before grabbing Avi’s chin. The little pieces of glass from Robbie’s hand nick at his skin, and he feels the blood flow down his neck as he tilts his head back.

“There are some things,” Robbie says, as his smile grows wicked, “that your black magic resistance won’t fix.”

“And look at that,” Robbie says, drawing a line down Avi’s neck. “Despite all your golden heritage, you bleed red.”

His vision is swimming. He doesn’t know much, but he knows it’s enough.

The heat is unbearable, but suddenly Avi feels cold.

“So it’s a death match,” He says. 

Robbie grins, and lunges at him.

Avi sweeps at his feet, and Robbie stumbles. His body feels like its burning, and the black magic seems to swirl around him. The fire encircles them both.

“Avi?” Lup calls. “Avi, I cannot hold that spell shape for long? You gotta get—”

A snap pierces the air. When the dust clears, Robbie’s hair is gray and long, floating in the air. His eyes are the lightest they’ve ever been, a blistering sort of dark red.

“No friends to contact left,” Robbie says. He slips on a metal gauntlet. “I look just like a prince,” he says, and Avi tackles him to the ground.

Robbie hits the ground with a shriek, and fists go flying. 

Everything feels like a flash bang, happening so fast Avi can’t quite process it. Robbie’s eyes are sparkling.

And just like a crescendo, everything builds. His head is ringing, and the heat around him is rising. The world grows brighter and brighter.

Robbie cackles. “Watch this!” he exclaims, and he sounds just like an excited child. His eyes blaze with an untested hunger.

Avi buckles to the ground, and everything goes dark.

He blinks, trying to regain his vision, but nothing happens. A gnawing panic settles within him. I can’t see? He doesn’t have time to register the full scope of what that means, because a second later, he footsteps around him.

“Holy shit!” Lup says. He squeezes his eyes shut, and he feels someone pick him up.

“Alright,” Lup says, “this place is going to blow in a couple of seconds, so lets get running.”

Avi coughs. “Robbie?”

“He’s going to die,” Barry says. “He—there’s nothing else he can do.”

The sunlight hits his face, and Avi is dropped unceremoniously to the ground.

“Sorry about that,” Kravitz says. He claps his hands. “Alright, stand guard!”

Lup claps her hand, and there’s a low rumbling noise before everything shakes, and Avi struggles to find his placing on the ground.

The echo of that noise stays with him for a long time. He hears the chorus of sighs around him, and hesitantly, clutches at his heart. If anything more happened, he thinks he’d be ripped out of his skin.

“Avi?”

Oh,  _fuck_.

He opens his eyes to find Lucretia staring at him. “Hey,” he says.

The sunlight frames her face, making the white of her hair seem to glow. The warmth on his skin, the silvery tint of the sky—all of it is normal, and wonderful.

“That was reckless of you,” she says.

“Okay,” Avi says, quick and breathless, “okay, but can I be healed or something because I’m not going to die but it also maybe hurts like a lot and I think we can talk about my idiot actions later.”

“Idiot ac—” Lucretia sighs. “Of course you’ll get healed,” she says.

Avi thinks he gives her a thumbs up, but he has already slipped back into the uncomfortable, oppressive dark.

 

* * *

 

He wakes up uncomfortable and alone. This is not a surprise. Lucretia is busy running a giant underground organization that stretches across the continent. If they told Magnus, they’d probably only scare him, and besides, Avi heals fast enough.

 _I can see again_ , he thinks, as he sits up.

 _Hopefully the danger has passed_ , he thinks, after shakily standing up. The miserable hypothetical of Robbie miraculously escaping and wreaking havoc hurts too much to dwell on, especially when he feels so weak.  

As always, the healing process is  _painful_. Avi’s not sure if the others have just developed a resistance to it, but the hits Avi take always seem to hurt a lot more than they should. He hasn’t been magically healed in a while. The last time, he’d wandered out of the room with a limp, and then Lucretia had told him to move into the base. She was terrifying back then, and honestly still is.  _It’s the genuine worry in her eyes that hurts the most_ , Avi decides.  _She doesn’t say she’s disappointed in you, but you feel it, anyways._

And as always, his body has been stitched up perfectly. This doesn’t mean that the old wounds don’t carry phantom aches, though. For the few recuperation days, Avi tends to just holes up in his room and watch the sunset. Then he usually resolves to be more cautious. But the thing is that he’s not good at that kind of patience, when things really come down to the wire.

He doesn’t like waiting for things.

Whenever he waits, doubt always seems to settle in his mind and fester like an ugly infection. This leads to the sort of spiraling that sends someone into an unbreakable depressive mood that lasts for days. In his heart, Avi knows that out of everyone, he is terrible with trauma. The others don’t mention this around him, but they all know.

 _It’s not like I don’t remember_ , Avi thinks.  _It’s not like no one acknowledges it._

He hums in the empty air, trying to fill up the space. He hates this period of waiting the most. He always wonders if anyone will really bother to return to him in this kind of room. Injury is a sign of failure, after all.

He sighs. His insecurity issues aren’t even that big of a deal.

 _I’m just lonely_ , he thinks.  _And I shouldn’t be._

It’s then that he hears a knock on the door. Avi jumps up, startled.

“Y—yes?” he calls out.

“Avi?”

He grimaces. That’s definitely Magnus’s voice. Avi would know, after hearing it over the Stone of Farspeech. It has this distinctive quality that’s hard to miss.

“Yeah, I’m here,” he says. “What’s up?”

There’s a long silence on the other end. “I heard you got hurt,” Magnus says.

“Yeah, that’s true,” Avi says, internally sighing. “Want to come in?”

Magnus steps into the room carefully, meeting Avi’s eyes with concern and caution. Avi offers a meager smile. He spots Taako and Merle in the hallway, keeping a watchful eye on the two.

“I’m okay,” he says, loud enough for all three to hear, but Taako and Merle just look all the more skeptical. The door closes in front of them, and Avi looks down at Magnus.

“I brought you your phone,” Magnus says, rummaging through the bag he’s brought along. “Also clothes, courtesy of Taako, food, courtesy of Taako, a toothbrush, courtesy of Taako.”

“Please tell me Taako is forcing you to credit him like this,” Avi cuts in.

Magnus smiles, sheepish. “Yeah,” he says. He glances around the room, and the smile drops from his face. “You don’t look that great,” he says.

“Everything just aches,” Avi explains. “I’ll be out of here today anyways.”

Magnus smiles. “Great!” 

Avi sighs and flops back onto the bed. He stares at the celling and bemoans his life choices. Magnus sits next to him on the side of the bed, aimlessly kicking at the air.

There’s the whoosh of Magnus swinging his legs in the air, and not much else sound.

After a period of silence, Avi reigns himself to his fate, and asks, “You’re not scared?”

“I mean,” Magnus says, “of course I’m scared. But if I’m here, I can help you out!”

“No!” The outburst surprises even Avi himself. He swallows. “I don’t want you to get hurt,” he says.

Magnus smiles. His gaze is soft. “The feeling is mutual.”

Avi struggles for the words to explain his jumbled mess of feelings, and eventually settles on, “I don’t want you to get hurt because of me.”

Magnus shrugs. “You can’t stop me,” he says.

He receives a glare in response, and laughs.

“Nah,” Magnus says, “I’ll be careful. But in exchange…”

“What?”

“You have to introduce me to the magical world,” Magnus says, with a big smile on his face. “You did promise, after all.”

For the first time since waking up, Avi laughs. “I did promise,” he agrees.

“And,” Magnus adds, “you’re going to show me the base, because I’ll be visiting ridiculously often.”

Avi laughs, again. “Don’t you have a job?” he asks.

And then Magnus grins. “Yeah,” he says. “I work for the Bureau of Balance now, remember?” He flicks Avi’s forehead. “You better get used to me.”

Avi smiles. His heart feels light. “I don’t think,” he says, slowly, wondering why the walls around him seem so much less desolate and suffocating, “that it will be a problem.”  

 

* * *

 

Magnus visits a lot, after that first day.

He always has this smile on his face, and it’s one that makes Avi’s heart jump whenever he sees it. Then Avi will usually open the door, beckoning him inside, and they’ll do a variety of things together that always leave Avi feeling much happier than before. He tries to tell himself it’s just that it’s nicer than being alone, but it’s hard to deny the fluttery, ambiguous feelings that crop up in his heart whenever he thinks of Magnus.

He confesses as much to absolutely no one.

Most times, Avi will be doing Bureau work when he walks in, and he’ll smile at Magnus before Nikitha bounds down the stairs and tackles him. The sunlight streams in through the windows, because Magnus always visits early morning, and then once Avi’s work is mostly finished, he’ll shut his laptop and remove his glasses from his face. Then he’ll usually stretch up into the sun, still up in the sky, and if Magnus is still there, they’ll go visiting the town.

Magnus takes to magic like he takes to smiling. That is to say he feels natural in a world of fairies and dragons. Happy, even. He’s already managed to greet half the town, who are enamored by his charm.

Avi pins it down to the absolute kindness that Magnus exudes from his eyes. It’s the type of thing that would make you follow him to the ends of the earth.

And it’s nice, spending time with him. Magnus is always bright and cheery and wild, and Avi feels free around him. It’s easy to just feel cool when they hang out together, and it’s even easier and easier to spend more and more time with him. It becomes routine to look up from his work and spot Magnus in the vicinity, and it’s a warm, comforting feeling that he can’t get enough of.

Sometimes, other Bureau members will drop in, with the most frequent visitors being Carey and Killian. They seem to have taken a liking to Magnus, which Avi can understand. Since Carey and Killian are the two that spend the most time in the training hall, expecting Avi, of course they would be delighted to find a new sparring partner.

The training hall is where Avi and Magnus tend to spend most of their time with each other. As pretty much the only human non-magical creature that Avi knows well, Magnus makes for a good sparring partner. The added bonus is that Magnus is ridiculously strong and seems to love fighting just as much as Avi does.

For a lot of months, it feels like Avi is floating on a dream.

Now that Robbie is dead, most of Avi’s work really just involves paperwork, and not using The Sight at all. It feels like he’s a little out of practice, sometimes, when he starts to focus in on things. They flicker in and out of sight, but always seem to come into focus at the end. Avi chalks it up to emotional dependency and unresolved issues that he never wants to discuss.

Other than that slight worry, life passes smoothly. Avi grows closer and closer to Magnus, and Magnus become more and more at ease with this new world. At a certain point in time, Avi had expected him to stop visiting him, but the frequency and intensity of Magnus’s visits haven’t seemed to slow at all.

Ever since his parents abandoned him without any form a notice, Avi has always felt a little more wary about new people in his life. Anyone who walks in can walk out of Avi’s life, forever.

So he tries not to get his hopes up. Magnus’s visits are probably just to see Nikitha.

Still, it’s hard not to…  _want_.

Carey and Killian walk into the bar one day and watch him cleaning the counter, staring wistfully at Magnus, slumped over the counter and snoring, and they look at him dryly. He immediately tears his gaze away from Magnus and smiles at them.

Magnus grins at Avi right before he leaves, and its then that Avi remembers exactly why he’s so infatuated with Magnus. 

 

* * *

 

 **carey:**  your crush is so obvious

 **carey:**  more obvious than me and killian

 **carey:**  h o w

 **avi:**  this is bullying

 **carey:**  it worked out fine for killian and me im sure u guys will be alright

 **avi:**  how about no though

 **carey:**  sure.

 **carey:**  good luck

 

* * *

 

“How did you and Lucretia meet?” Magnus asks one day. Avi’s leaning on his shoulder as the golden sunlight from the windows warms the both of them in the summer.

“Oh,” Avi says, trying and failing not to feel an ugly pit in his stomach. “It’s not really a fun story.”

Magnus nudges his shoulder and offers Avi a reassuring smile. “Yeah, but it’s yours. I want to hear it.”

Avi sighs. “Well, I can’t deny you that.”

Magnus smiles. Avi pauses for a moment to collect his thoughts.

“It’s simple,” he eventually says. “She wanted to repurpose the house I hadn’t touched in forever, she appreciated my ability, and I was fresh out of college, alone, and needed information.”

“Ouch,” Magnus says. “That situation doesn’t sound fun.”

“Most of the building—the heirlooms and architecture—remains intact, so it was a pretty good deal. Also, I like not being unemployed.” He frowns. “To be honest, I didn’t trust her that much when we first met.”

Magnus hums. “But you’re friends now.”

“I trust her,” Avi says, declining to confirm the friends comment. It’s an issue a little too complex to touch. “She trusts me. But she’s busy often.”

“Do you wish you could see her more?”

“Well,” Avi says. “Yeah. I guess I do want that. I like seeing the whole Bureau.”

“No wonder your house is a base,” Magnus says with a laugh. “You really like people.”

“Huh,” Avi says. He lets that though sink in. “Huh,” he says, again. “I guess I do.”

Magnus ruffles his hair. “How did you think you didn’t?”

Avi laughs. “I don’t know!” he says. “I just—well, I get awkward, so I just didn’t ever, like, consider it, I guess?”

"Wow," Magnus says. 

"You know," Avi continues, "this is a tangent, but there's this one phrase my mother always told me. I guess it sort of reminded me of Lucretia, when we first met."

"What's the phrase?"

"The sun is not far from here," Avi recites, closing his eyes, because these words feel almost like a prayer. "Even the littlest light will allow you to see. And if you have no light, you make your own."

Magnus smiles. “You’re great, Avi,” he says. “Like, the coolest person I know.”

Avi flushes. “Thanks,” he mutters. His heart is beating way too fast.

They’re too close and it’s comfortable and yet not at all. It’s the special way that Magnus’s presence just seems to touch him. His laughter is infectious and when he moves, he is always the most vivid person in the room.

Avi feels so warm, and it’s not just the sun. It’s a type of thing that makes him feel tender and strong all at once. He looks into Magnus’s eyes and lets the smile in him fall out with ease.

 _I should tell him now_ , he thinks.  _I should really, really tell him now._

He stays quiet.

 

* * *

 

The infatuation becomes almost unbearable, in the coming days. Magnus’s smile, his laugh, his eyes, his hair—it is inescapably hard not to love everything about him.

On one particular day, Avi finishes his work early, and paces around the base, unsure of what to do. 

Magnus finds him in the hallway walking circles around a single title, and laughs. “Come on,” he says, motioning outside. “Let’s go to the arcade. I don’t think I’ve even seen you play Dance Dance Revolution.”

Avi smiles. “I don’t think I’ve even been to an arcade with you,” he responds.

Magnus waves that off. “I bet you’ll be good at it,” he says. “Since you’re so good at athletic things.”

Avi snorts. “I have terrible coordination, trust me,” he says. “I’ll probably trip on the dance mat.”

At that, Magnus laughs, and then ushers him into the arcade.

For some reason the normal clutter of flashing lights doesn’t bother him as much as it used to. Avi thinks this is because of the way that Magnus is smiling right next to him. All of the lights pale in comparison.

This is a place Avi had never really expected to be in, because it used to be so painful, but now that he’s inside, the games seem like harmlessly good fun. At another date, he’d love to try everything out one by one.

Magnus, though, has other ideas. He drags Avi to the Dance Dance Revolution station, plugs in a song, and then elbows Avi right before they’re about to start.

As expected, Avi does miserable, and actually manages to trip over and almost hit his face. But by the end, he’s laughing, and so is Magnus.

“I can’t believe you lost so badly, Avi,” Magnus says, stifling his laughter.

Avi smirks. “Bet you that I could beat you at air hockey,” he says.

Magnus’s eyes light up, and he runs off towards the air hockey table.

Avi follows.

He does not say  _I got to see you laugh, and that’s a better win than the entire world._  That would be sappy.

He thinks it for the rest of the day, though.

 

* * *

 

That night, Avi wonders if he should tell him.

 

 **avi:**  hey magnus do you wanna get coffee tomorrow

 **magnus:**  yes!!!!

 **avi:**  haha cool cool

 **avi:**  10 AM?

 **magnus:**  yeah that sounds great!!!!!

 

 _I want this to be a date_ , Avi thinks.

 

 **avi:**  yep it’s pretty cool

 **avi:**  well

 **avi:**  goodnight, I guess

 **magnus:**  see you!

 **avi:**  see ya!

 

Avi curls up in his bed, heart beating, and wondering why the first step is so hard.

 _I can tell him tomorrow_ , he thinks, already knowing it’s an empty lie.

 _Tomorrow_ , he thinks, and drifts off to sleep.

 

* * *

 

The coffee is good, but it's 10 AM and Avi would feel much better having this conversation drunk. But he can't shirk off his responsibility, so here he is, sitting in a cafe in winter, holding a cup of coffee and not drinking it because it would only serve to make him more nervous.

Taako appears around the corner and slides into the seat opposite Avi.

"What's up," he says, and when Avi doesn't respond, too busy with his brain hitting ambulance sirens and screaming  _what the fuck_ , Taako snatches the coffee cup out of his hand.

He takes a large swallow and leans back on his seat, legs stretched out far enough to awkwardly hit against Avi's legs under the table.

"You have good taste in coffee," Taako says, taking a sip. "Thanks for holding onto it for me."

"That's—"

"Your coffee? Aviiiiiii, we know you're too nervous to drink it. And if you were going to say 'that's Magnus' seat', I came to tell you he's not coming."

"Oh," Avi says. So much for facing your fears.

"He was very apologetic," Taako says. And then he leans forward. "And you know what the weirdest part is? He didn't think this was a date. Would you mind telling me why?"

"Uh," Avi says. "I'm. We don't have that kind of relationship."

He sighs. "But," he admits. "It would be nice. This is the first time I've liked a guy, I think. It's... awkward."

"Yeah," Taako agrees, “you're a mess, and you're hiding under convenient heterosexuality to kind of date Magnus while avoiding actual commitment.”

Avi winces. "Yeah," he says. "I'm not doing my best at this. I need to actually hold a proper conversation with him about it." He can feel the heat coming off his face. It's probably not a pretty sight.

"And you will," Taako says, voice losing some of the initial edge he walked in with. "Which is why I'm here. First, you're going to actually talk about your big dumb crush on Magnus, instead of obviously letting everyone know but never vocalizing it. Sound good?"

Avi relaxes. "Sounds good," he echoes.

"Sweet," Taako says. "Don't worry, I got you hot chocolate," he adds, procuring it from seemingly thin air, and Avi is reminded that Taako's a really good friend.

 

* * *

 

“I just—like him so much,” Avi ends up babbling. “Like he’s got really good muscles. And a really good smile? And a really good—Magnus is amazing, Taako. And how d I even know if he’ll like me?”

Taako laughs. “Magnus is into you,” he promises. “Trust me, I’m the greatest transmutation wizard of all time.”

Avi smiles. “I hope so,” he says.

Taako narrows his eyes. “You can’t run from your feelings forever, he says. “You just have to face it with the extent of your knowledge.

He really, really likes Magnus. Likes almost everything about him. 

Avi sighs. “Alright, I’ll do it,” he says.

“Really?” Taako asks.

“Really,” Avi says.

Walking back to the base makes him realize just how nerve wracking it is, to bear his soul for only the hope of a good result. He steels his nerves and walks in anyways.

The first thing Avi sees is Magnus, who is sitting on a barstool with a piece of wood and a carving knife, whittling out what is presumably a duck.

He brightens up when he spots up Avi. “Hey!” he says, placing the knife and half-finished duck down.

“Hey,” Avi says. “Sorry for not being around until now.”

Magnus shrugs. “Sorry for not showing up.”

“Yeah.” Avi inhales, exhales, and plants his feet on the ground. “I, uh, kind of wanted to talk a little bit with you.”

“It’s not anything bad, right?” Magnus asks, smiling.

“Well,” Avi says with a sigh. “I hope so.”

Magnus’s brows are furrowed. “…Okay.”

Avi points at the stairs. “I’m just… gonna go,” he says. “I’ll be at that one room.”

“With the big windows,” Magnus confirms, with a reassuring smile. “I’ll be up in a minute.”

Avi drags his body up the stairs and into the room, opening the curtains until sunlight floods into the room. The daylight makes him feel a little less vulnerable. He paces around the room.

“Alright,” he mutters to himself, trying to approximate a pep talk, “you can do this!”

“Do what?”

Avi freezes where he is, and turns to see Magnus, who walks into the room and sits down on the couch. He’s smiling. 

“Okay,” Avi says, and then the words freeze in his throat.

“Am I making you nervous?” Magnus asks, after a moment.

“Yes—no—stay,” Avi says through gritted teeth. Magnus looks at him quizzically.

“Okay,” Avi says, staring at the ceiling and praying for strength, “could you just stand up, maybe, I can’t do this with you sitting down.”

Magnus gets up off of the couch, coming to face Avi. Their eyes meet, and it’s too much.

Avi ducks his head. “All right,” he says, trying to work up his courage. “All right.”

“Avi?” Magnus’s voice is concerned. _Rightfully so, when you’re about to fuck things up_ , a persnickety voice in his head says.

Magnus reaches out and grabs his wrist. Avi looks down at him with mortification that’s probably a little too obvious. And yet, even though his heart is beating out of his chest, Avi suddenly feels soothed.

“You okay?” Magnus asks, and Avi blurts it out.

“Do you want to go out for dinner sometime?” he asks, voice cracking up an octave midway through the question. Magnus’s hand still on his wrist.

Avi squeezes his eyes shut, and then opens them again.  _Just a little bit more,_  he thinks.

“As—as a date,” Avi says, stumbling over his words. “I’m—fuck—I’m asking you out on a date.”

Magnus’s hand releases his wrist. Avi steps back, breathing hard, hoping and wishing harder than he’s ever hoped and wished in his whole life. He just—he  _wants_  this so badly.

“Oh my god,” Magnus says softly, and then: “I think I’m going to cry.”

“Is that ba—”

“ _I’d love to go_ ,” Magnus yells, startling them both. He flushes. “I just—wow, Avi. I really like you. I’ve liked you for a while.”

“I really like you too!” Avi half-shouts. “I just—I was nervous—”

“You couldn’t tell I was staring at you all the time?” Magnus asks, laughing.

Avi cries, “Well, I was staring at  _you_!”

The admission makes them both blush and look away.

Avi exhales the weight of the world. “I’m so happy,” he says. “I’m just—really happy.”

Magnus smiles. “Yeah, uh, me too.” He stares off into space before adding, “There’s this song I’ve actually wanted to play for you for a super long while now, but I was too embarrassed to do it.”

“Why, is it a love song?” Avi teases.

“Well,” Magnus says, staring at the ground, “kind of.”

“Oh,” Avi says. “Oh.”

“Um—I’ll just play it,” Magnus says.

Avi nods. “Sounds good.” In a little bit of a daze, he collapses on the couch, groaning. “This is so nerve-wracking,” he says.

“Yeah, it is,” Magnus says, thumbing through the music on his phone. He grins at the screen, and Avi is reminded that all of this embarrassment is worth something priceless.

“I really like you,” Avi says, unprompted, and Magnus almost drops his phone.

Avi laughs. “I didn’t know I could make you nervous like that,” he says.

“I called you ‘the person with pretty eyes’ and relentlessly complimented you when drunk and you think I’m not nervous around you?” Magnus asks. He shakes his head. “But actually, this time is because the song is actually just called ‘I Really Like You’.”

Something warm and soft bubbles up in Avi’s chest. “Is that so,” he says.

“Yep,” Magnus answers. “oh—here it is!” He taps on the phone, and a peppy tune starts playing from the speakers. He drops it on the table by the sofa and sits down next to Avi, just like usual.

“Ah,” Avi says, as the music plays behind them, “I have to send Taako flowers.”

Magnus snickers. “As thanks?”

“Yeah,” Avi admits, sheepish. “He kind of marched over and made me realize that I just had to tell you.”

“That’s nice of him,” Magnus says.

“It is,” Avi says, leaning into him. “I hope this isn’t weird anymore,” he says.

Magnus smiles. “No. It’s good.”

“It’s going to be sunset soon,” Avi says, after a minute.

“Just listen to the song,” Magnus says.

“Alright.”

By the end, Avi is acutely aware of why this song might have been embarrassing to play. He can feel the nervousness radiating off Magnus in waves.

“I liked the music,” Avi assures him. “I don’t listen to pop that often, but I liked it.”

Magnus grins. “I’m really happy,” he says. “And I really like you, too.”

Avi laughs. “Oh, come  _on_!”

It’s the vibrancy of Magnus’s laugh that sets Avi’s heart aflutter.

Life has never felt better.

 

* * *

 

He’s walking on the cobblestone path when he spots the same familiar fairy, and he waves to her.

“You’re a sparrow today!” he exclaims. “That’s a change.”

She flushes. “How did you notice?”

“Oh, I can just, see it, like a sort of faint mirage around you,” Avi explains.

The fairy smiles. “It seems like you’ve improved the control of your vision!” she says. “You never used to be able to see the mirage I actually had on.”

Avi shrugs. “I’m seeing straight through like usual, though.”

And at that, the fairy smiles. “I don’t know,” she says. “Things seem different.”

Avi grins. “It’s probably just because I’m happy,” he says. 

She does a spin in the air. “What’s got you in such a good mood, then?” she asks.

He  waves at the air, embarrassed. “Oh—uh, Magnus. He’s, um, great.”

Her eyes sparkle. “Do you need anything special?” she asks. “Because I’ll definitely help out if you need anything special. Some luck in love?”

Avi laughs. “No, I feel lucky enough. But thank you.”

 

* * *

 

Taako bakes him a cake and delivers it that night with absolutely zero warning. Kravitz tags along because he’s nice, and the three of them celebrate without saying anything about what they’re celebrating. Avi enjoys it a lot more than he thought he would.

Every month, Taako brings over a dessert for the three of them, and somehow Avi doesn’t even feel like a third wheel. On those days, Avi knows that Magnus is usually out celebrating with Carey and Killian, for any occasion that seems to fall around the same time.

He doesn’t think that anything is better than this bliss.

 

* * *

 

It’s been half a year, and being with Magnus feels like breathing air, only nicer.

“Hey,” Avi says, typing out papers for the Bureau.

“Hey,” Magnus says, sitting next to him and quickly kissing his cheek.

Avi smiles and turns towards him. “How was your day?”

Magnus grins. “Great,” he says. “Better now that you’re here.”

“Avi,” Magnus says. “Don’t you need your glasses?”

“What?”

Magnus points towards the case left on the desk. “I thought the laptop hurt your eyes,” he says.

Avi pauses. “Yeah,” he says, slowly, “you’re right.”

The conversation from a few months ago hits him like a bullet. He sees mirages now. He sees computer screens without glasses now. Arcade lights don’t bother him as much, now. Like an idiot, he’d attributed most of it to the transformative power of—what? Love?—being around Magnus, but now, reality seems to hang on him like a heavy weight.

“I’m fine,” Avi says, but he can’t breathe. “Magnus, I—”

“…Avi?”

“I’m sorry,” he says, and then he’s half-screaming, half-crying, too scared to even move. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you have to go—”

Magnus crouches down in front of him. “I’m staying,” he assures, but it only makes Avi’s heartbeat spike higher. The panic gnawing in his chest only seems to increase.

He remembers:

_You have gold eyes._

_They, uh—they’re nice._

He pushes Magnus away from him and stands up, almost tripping over his own legs in the scramble.

Tears are welling up in his eyes, but he forces everything down, down, down.

“I can’t love you,” he says, and then he runs.

He can’t see the streets around him as he flees, and Avi doesn’t know whether it’s because he’s going blind, or if it’s because he’s crying so badly his vision blurs to nothing but darkness.

 

* * *

 

Avi has his head buried in his hands. He hasn’t moved in a long while. His throat is hoarse. He hates everything. A few hours ago, someone had tried to knock on his door, but the wards had blown them off.

The wards that Avi can’t even see. He’s lucky that muscle memory reminds him how to do the basics, but with the loss of his sight, it feels like half the world has been ripped away from him.

A sharp crack flashes through his door, and in walks Taako, radiating pure anger and most likely something magical.

Avi sighs.  _Time to get kicked out_ , he thinks. “Hey,” he says, though Taako seems to be looking right past him, eyes burning with insurmountable anger.

“You’re going to fucking explain why Magnus is crying in my bedroom and ruining my effortless aesthetic and you’re going to do it  _right now_ , motherfucker,” Taako hisses, and shuts the door. It slams shut with a loud bang and the sound knocks around him, and his ears are ringing, and his head aches like usual, and—

And fuck, Avi can’t even be mad, can only stare at Taako in fright and feel ugly, ugly ugly—

“Fine! Just be silent, you douche,” Taako fumes, throwing his hands up in the air, “Literally you like him so much, why the fuck did you break up with him? You like being in a relationship with him. You  _want_ to.”

“I can’t,” he yells, piercing the silence, and it is too much of an admission, but everything in him feels raw and awful and fuck, that’s always how the truth comes, doesn’t it? It never hits him soft in the night. Instead it bowls you over like the feeling of box stabbed from all sides. It feels like you’re getting cut even if you’re only watching yourself or the magician stab in those swords and it hurts hurts hurts—

And then the words come easy.

“He thinks my eyes are pretty, Taako. He thinks I’m—I’m fucking  _pretty_. I ruined his fuckin life. I ruined mine.”

“He’s happy because of you!” Taako screams right back. “Right now he’s sad about you! What the fuck, dude!”

“I don’t know,” Avi sobs, and the tears just keep flowing. “I don’t know, but I keep hating what I’m doing, because I don’t want to disappoint him because I think I’m in love with him but also I fucked everything up! Everything!  _I’m going to lose my eyes!_ ”

Taako just stares at him, wide-eyed. “I need to call Kravitz,” he says, voice carrying an appropriate amount of horror. “Apparently something so much fucking worse is happening.”

Avi takes in a deep breath, trying to find some threads of calm within him. It doesn’t work, but he doesn’t feel like he’s free-falling into a landmine.

“Uh,” Taako says. “Avi, my man… some  _explanation_?”

“It—that first day when Magnus came in,” Avi says, forcing the words out, “I tested the antidote on myself, and it fucked with my vision. And—and the effects faded soon after I woke up, but I—”

“Seriously unsafe,” Taako says, “but your potions are never supposed to be that grand? Unless you were desperate.”

“No,” Avi says, “I didn’t make anything dangerous, but… I  _must_ have fucked it up somehow, because nowadays I keep getting headaches, and I keep losing The Sight, and everything hurts and I can’t see half the shit I used to—” “And,” Avi adds, with growing terror, “If I can’t see I can’t do work, and at this point I should just leave everything—“

“Avi,” Taako says.

“And,” Avi adds, with growing terror, “If I can’t see I can’t do work, and at this point I should just leave everything—“

“Avi,” Taako says again, this time more insistently. “Have—oh boy this is gonna be rough.”

Avi laughs. “Called Kravitz yet?”

“I will,” Taako says. “Actually, I will call Magnus, but only when you let me.”

“Thank goodness,” Avi sighs.

“Anyways, to finish what I was saying?”

“Yeah?”

“Have you ever considering that maybe this whole situation isn’t your fault?”

Avi blinks. “What?”

Taako shrugs. “I’m just saying, dude, remember that one time I brought those awful macarons in?”

“The poisoned ones?”

“Yeah. I almost lost like every ounce of confidence I had in my cooking right there,” Taako says. “But, you know, that was Sazed.”

“Your point?”

“Maybe it’s not you, or that potion that’s causing you to lose your Sight,” Taako tells him. “And…” He glares at Avi.

Avi nods. “I’ll tell Magnus everything,” he promises.

“That’s quicker than I expected you to cave,” Taako muses. “Realized anything important?”

“He’s probably mad at me…” Avi says, and Taako nods approvingly. “And I shouldn’t hide things from him, because even if he hates me after this and I broke up with him, he’s one of my closest friends…” He winces. He really does sound like a douche.

Another nod. Avi continues, “And I should tell him how I feel, but maybe not at the same time.”

Taako wipes a fake tear from his eyes. “How my child has learned.”

He then taps twice on the smooth stone hanging from his neck. “Hey, darling?”

“Oh. Uh, hi, Taako. What’s going on?”

“I’m dealing with… a crisis,” Taako says, eyeing Avi carefully. “You free?”

“I’ll be right there,” Kravitz says. “Love you.”

And Taako smiles—soft, warm, and calm—as the tension just seems to leave him. Avi can feel it too, and he exhales, tries to think through the pain.

“Love you too,” Taako says, and a click sounds from his neck, ending the call. Somehow, hearing them talk makes the world just a little brighter.

 _Oh_ , Avi realizes after a beat,  _I want that._   _With—with Magnus. I want that._

The force of that feeling makes his legs feel weak, and he sinks to the ground with a sigh.

Taako crouches down to meet his eyes. “I am the greatest fucking transmutation wizard in the world,” he says. “Trust me, you’ll be fine.”

“Ah,” Avi says, and he understands. “Red pill, right?”

Taako grins. “Something like that.”

 

* * *

 

Avi knocks on Magnus’s door as softly as he can.

“Taako, you can go,” he hears Magnus yell, and the sound of his voice makes Avi want to rip his throat out.

“Uh,” he says, voice pitched barely above a whisper, “Magnus. It’s me. I… need to talk to you. And explain things.”

There’s a long silence.

“Are you coming in here to break up with me?” Magnus asks, and he sounds so sad, so vulnerable. Avi flinches. This is why the night has never worked out for him. It makes everything hurt twice as worse.

“No,” he says. “Unless you want to.”

Magnus opens the door a crack. He sighs upon seeing Avi’s face. “Well, come on in,” he says.

Avi inches into his room. “I know that I just ran away from you with absolutely no explanation,” he begins. “That was a bad idea. I just overreacted to something I realized in the moment.”

“Just talk as best as you can,” Magnus mutters, crossing his arms. “You can be all eloquent later, when I decide if I want to stay and hear more or not.”

“Right,” Avi says, “right.” He pauses to collect his thoughts. “Well, I’ll start off with the big thing, I guess.”

He sighs. “I’m going blind. And—”

“ _What?_ ” Magnus shrieks.

Avi forces a smile. “More on that later,” he promises. “But I only realized this yesterday, and I freaked out really badly, and took it out on you.”

He pauses. “And,” he adds, “I’m sorry for telling you I couldn’t love you. It’s the opposite. I was—I was afraid that you wouldn’t like me anymore, once I went blind. And I was afraid that without my eyes, I would be ripped out of the magical world. I’d… never be able to give you anything like that.”

Avi hangs his head. “That’s the short of it,” he says. “But more importantly… I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that.”

 _It’s not a good apology by any means_ , Avi thinks,  _but now the truth is out._

After a long silence, Magnus sighs. “I want to hug you,” he says.

“What?”

“I want to hug you,” Magnus says, a little louder. “For comforting you, but also because I want to be hugged by you, to comfort me.”

He looks up at Avi. His eyes are teary. “Even if you don’t have your vision… I still think you’re great, Avi.”

And then he smiles. “I really missed you.”

 “I’m in love with you,” Avi blurts out, and he’s never turned red in his entire life, but he can feel the heat in his face and thinks that the blush must be obvious, at this point. “I—I mean, I think I am,” he continues, “I just—”

“Avi.” Magnus’s voice is quiet, calm.

“...Yeah?”

“Don’t run away from it.”

Avi sighs, and meets Magnus’s eyes. “I’m scared of loving you,” he admits. “Loving someone… it’s important. And the future is so uncertain. But I love you even if I don’t know what’s going to happen.”

Magnus smiles. “Love you too,” he says, and it is simple, just like that.

Avi steps forward, and they both fall into a tight hug. Avi buries his face in Magnus’s shoulder.

 _Thank you_ , he thinks.

“Let me stay a little longer?” he asks.

There’s a pause. Magnus flicks the lights off. In the dark, Avi can feel the stars on his shoulder, and for the first time, is thankful for the quiet that the night brings.

With the light of the moon, he sees Magnus’s small nod, and Avi lets himself melt into his embrace.

 

* * *

 

The next day is spent by mostly talking. Magnus speaks in halting sentences about his past, and Avi listens, and reciprocates as best as he can. Taako drops in along with Kravitz, occasionally dropping by to give updates on his communication with Lucretia and when she’s available.

It’s almost sunset when the topic of Avi’s family comes up. Taako has just announced that he’s managed to get Lucretia out of her job and clear a few days of free time for her, through some sort of miracle work.

“They left you?” Magnus asks quietly. “They disappeared, just like that?”

“Two—almost three years ago,” Avi confirms. “Middle of the night. No one knows their whereabouts.”

Magnus sits, pensive. “And—and you’re okay?” he asks.

Avi shrugs. “I try to be.”

Magnus bites his lips. “It’s just,” he says slowly, “I think that you’re forcing your happiness, just a little bit. I mean, the people you loved most in the world left you, and they’re the only ones who might possibly be able to explain your powers, only they’re gone. It must be awful for you. They were your parents, after all.”

Hearing it phrased that way feels like it unlocks some ugly scar within him. The words hit too far away and too close for him to feel anything but hysteria.

Avi laughs. He curls into an almost fetal position on the couch, and laughs until his throat grows hoarse and it feels more like he’s choking in the dark than anything else. The air on his skin is cold and his chest is tight, but part of him feels like it’s about to split open and finally be free. He laughs for a long, long time. “No,” he says, and his voice feels raw. “No—it’s not—it’s not like that.”

Magnus blinks up at him. “What do you mean?”

“I—” Avi shudders in the cold air. Magnus moves closer to him, hesitantly bumping against his arm.

“Fuck,” Avi says suddenly, glancing at the two of them. “I can’t believe I’m like this—I’m so sorry, I know I said it before but that was awful of me—”

“It’s fine,” Magnus says. “Well, it’s not fine, but—” He worries his lip for a moment, and then smiles. “If you want to lean on me,” he begins, and Avi is already scooting closer to him, leaning into his side and sinking into the warmth of him. Magnus grins up at him.

Avi wipes the tears forming in his eyes. “I’m not sad because I loved them,” Avi says, and it feels like a weight has dropped from his back. He leans his head back with a long sigh. His voice is quiet, and the only thing Avi hears around him is Magnus’s soft breathing, and the sound of him talking. It’s easy to be quiet in this space, and even easier to let the truth slip out.

“I’m sad because I don’t know what to do without them.”

He’s been hiding it for so long that the admission surprises him.

Magnus tilts his head, considering his words carefully. “What’s the difference?”

Avi finds Magnus’s hand and grips it. He steels his nerves. He really doesn’t want to cry again. “I need them, only they didn’t need me, and they didn’t want me,” Avi says. “They disappeared because they couldn’t handle The Sight. And without them, I don’t know how to use it anymore.”

“I thought it was the potion that made you unable to,” Magnus says. “But now it’s this, too?”

Avi shakes his head. “Let me clarify,” he says. “When they were around, I used to be able to control the level at which I saw things. And now that they’re not, my vision is just full all the time. If I want to see farther, or do more, the only thing I can do is pretend I’m almost three years younger.”

The weight of it settles between them. Magnus holds his hand. Avi knows that Magnus is looking at him, but he doesn’t know how to meet his eyes.

So they breathe.

It is Avi that breaks the silence with a self-deprecating laugh. “I really am a child,” he says with a sigh. “I just need to grow up already and become an adult.”

Magnus keeps staring at him. “I don’t think…” he says, and then trails off.

Avi turns towards him. “What do you think?”

“I don’t think you’re all  _bad_  now, Avi,” Magnus says. “You did pretty good for being all alone.” He grins. “I’m pretty happy to know that you managed to make your way all the way here, through your work. Otherwise, we would have never met.”

And—

Just like that, the tightness in his chest seems to snap.

One moment, he’s trying to sink into himself, and the next moment, he’s bawling openly, covering his face with his hands.

“And,” Magnus says, like he’s trying to kill him with his kindness, “it’s okay to cry. I’ll be right here.”

So Avi cries.

It feels like a flood has just been ripped out of him, and when the wave is over, he’s curled up and shaking, trying to steady his heartbeat. He wipes his eyes dry.

“I have just one question,” Magnus says.

Avi points towards his throat, and takes in a deep, shuddery breath.

“Can’t talk, huh,” Magnus says.

Avi holds up a finger to tell him to wait. It takes a minute, but he finally steadies his breathing. His chest aches, but in this hollow way, so unlike the way it usually feels like it’s about to burst.

“Okay,” he rasps. “Give it a go. What’s your question?”

“Were you happy with them?”

“With who?”

“Your family,” Magnus supplies.

Avi sighs. “I don’t know,” he admits, pensive. The golden rays of the sunset filter in through the slits of the curtain. “I don’t know,” he says again.

 

* * *

 

“So there’s this guy,” Avi says, staring down at his cup of coffee.

Lucretia smiles. “And?”

He swallows. “And I like him,” Avi says. “I like him a lot. Love him, maybe.”

He meets her eyes. They are looking at him with a kind and fond expression. He can’t help but feel nervous under her gaze.

Lucretia has always been a little bit untouchable. She’s their fearless leader. The others love her, but she’s not…

She’s not Avi’s friend. Not yet.  

Here, as she sits across him, sipping her tea, she looks regal as always. Her eyes shimmer and shift from pink to blue like they always do, and not a hair seems out of place in her bun. She’s dressed smartly like always, her makeup looks amazing, and she looks at peace with the world.

Avi is wearing a jacket a size too big and the first t-shirt and jeans he grabbed from the closet, he keeps fidgeting, and his head is aching. He he hasn’t slept right in weeks, and he knows for a fact he’s slouching. _Ah, they would have hated it_ , he thinks, and sighs. His parents aren’t around anymore. He should stop thinking about what they would say. But he’s nowhere near peace.

“I’m happy for you,” Lucretia says, setting her tea down with a note of finality. “Magnus and you are sweet together.”

And she’s smiling. It shouldn’t mean so much but it does. He’s always liked her as a person and now he keeps wondering why he never talked to her enough. It’s easy to tell her these things and to confide in her. She is receptive and knowledgeable and kind. Avi knows that much.

Maybe it’s that with the more distance he keeps, the more he retains the image of a prince with a powerful bloodline and an important power. Maybe it’s that Avi is just three huge messes stacked into a trenchcoat and trying to pass for a human, and Lucretia is the TSA agent who, by all miracles, hasn’t found out yet.

He sighs again. It is time to ruin her good opinion of him.

“There’s one more thing,” he says, as she rises.

She raises an eyebrow, seems to note his troubled expression, and sits back down.

“I—” He feels like he’s losing his breath. He glances down at his coffee. He was going to meet Magnus here, a while back. He can hear Taako yelling at him to spill the truth.

He feels emotional before the wave of emotions even crashes down on him. He really does know so many good people.

His tears drip into the coffee. Avi blinks. He didn’t mean to start crying.

“Avi?” Lucretia asks. He looks up. She’s reaching out a hesitant hand.

“Madam Director,” Avi says. “I—”

He swallows and steadies himself. Taako had promised a happy ending. He meets her eyes.

“I am going blind,” he says. “I have been for a while now.”

He sees when the words reach her. Her eyes widen. Her normally calm expression trembles, for just a moment. But she stays cool and keeps her composure. It is the mark of a strong woman. He admires her for staying so unemotional.

In an instant, she does not. Lucretia jumps onto the table, staring Avi down. Her face is twisted into a painful expression. “How?” she asks. “How can I help?”

Avi is too stunned to move.

Lucretia grabs his shoulders. “Please tell me you’ll be okay,” she says, and her hands are trembling. “I will do everything in my power to make it so.” Her eyes are welling up with tears.

Avi blinks. “I don’t know much,” he says. “I was hoping to ask you—”

She hugs him, and she’s warm. It feels like something he’s been yearning for his whole life.

The steel on his chest glows warm and bright and kind.

Lucretia protects him, even now.

 

* * *

                                     

“So, to summarize, you drank your own potion because you were stressed, went temporarily blind, and then slowly began to lose your ability to see after that?”

Avi nods.

Lucretia sighs. “We’re doing a meeting on safety at some point later this month, and you’re scheduling it,” she says. “Don’t mess with potions like that.”

He nods.

“When was your vision at its fullest height?” Lucretia asks.

Avi frowns. “Probably that fight we had with Robbie,” he says.

Lucretia sighs. “Avi, I’d bet that if anyone meant to make you blind, it would be Robbie.”

“Fuck,” Avi groans. “I should have thought about that immediately.”

“It’s fine,” Lucretia says. “You were scared. We all do strange things due to fear.”

Avi sighs. “He smashes this black vial against my hand,” he says. “I doubt we can find anything to cure that, though, since it’s all burned to the ground.”

Magnus bites his lip, clearly unhappy. “Uh,” he says.

Avi turns towards him. “Yeah?”

“I mean,” Magnus says, “Pringles has done some fucked up shit. Are we… really sure he’s dead?”

Lucretia’s eyes widen. “No,” she says, “I suppose we hadn’t considered that.”

“If anyone could do it…” Taako says. “It’d be Pringles himself.”

Avi laughs. “Sorry,” he says. “I just should have expected this, considering how delusional he is.”

“Ah,” Lucretia says, with a dry smile, “no one expects anything from Robbie in the first place. He defies all laws of nature.”  
She pulls up a map of the town. “I assume he’s sadistic enough to watch you suffer,” she says, and taps out three different points on the map. “Check the ground on this,” she instructs. “We’re going in as a full team in this one. Any objections?”

Avi shakes his head. “Excellent work like always,” he says.

Lucretia smiles. “Well, it’s for you. Nothing else would suffice.”

She taps on her Stone of Farspeech. “Taako, Lup, Barry, Davenport, Merle,” she says. “The IPRE is reassembling for a mission. Be ready in the early morning of tomorrow.”

“Sure thing,” Lup says. “We’ll all be there. Anything else?”

“Could Kravitz get in touch with the Raven Queen?” Lucretia asks. “I want to see if we can figure out if Robbie is really dead or not.”

Magnus smiles. “You’re capable as always,” he says.

She laughs. “I’m part of the IPRE,” she says. “How can I not be?”

At that Avi grins. “And you’re our Bureau founder,” he adds. “How could you not be great?”

“Rise early tomorrow,” Lucretia says. She pats him on the shoulder. “Everything will be alright.”

Surprising even himself, Avi believes in her.

In the eleventh hour, he has no doubt.

 

* * *

 

After searching all three locations, Magnus and Avi happen upon a small crevice on the outskirts of town. They gather the IPRE together, and motion them forwards.

“Magnus and Avi, take vanguard,” Lucretia says. “It’ll be best if he sees your faces, and best if we can guard you from behind.

“Alright,” Avi says. He clasps Magnus’s hand.

The shared warmth through their palms makes Avi’s resolve steady.

They enter the house, and it is quiet. Magnus and Avi wander down the winding corridor in front of them. It has no alternate pathways, and is lit with bright colored lights.

They wander through the corridor for what seems like well over an hour, and Avi’s eyes have almost fallen shut about 5 times during the walk.

Luckily, or unluckily, Robbie makes an appearance in the next two minutes. He pops down from the ceiling with a giant smile, eyes blazing that familiar blood-red color.

“So you’re back,” Robbie says. His voice echoes around the hallway, and it makes the irritation in Avi’s mind bloom into a field of thorns.

“Can’t blind me that easily,” Avi says, deliberately playing towards Robbie’s weakness for confrontation. “Maybe you should stop being so obsessed with my eyes.”

Robbie smiles. “Other people have an obsession with them, too,” he says, picking at his fingernails. “Others have affinity, but no passion.”

Avi claps slowly. “Nice monologue,” he says, and then readies his weapon.

Robbie grins. “As if I would let you fight again,” he says, and smiles. “You think that this potion will stop at your blinding?”

Avi freezes. “Poison?” he asks.

“Venom,” Robbie corrects with glee, and Magnus swings his axe at the apparition.

His voice grows louder, and it rings in Avi’s head. “I know you fear the loss of your light the most,” Robbie says.

Avi’s heart stills, and in that snap second, everything goes dark. He wakes up lost in the void, and feels all his fears calling him.

 

* * *

 

Avi’s in the dark and he hates the dark, he hates it—

And he knows why.

There’s a reason he’s been going blind without even noticing. There’s a reason why it feels familiar. There’s a reason why he let it slip past him so easily.

It’s happened before.

Under the full moon, his mother and father left, and Avi has slipped into dreamless, black sleep, and when he had woken up, it had been dark, too.

It’s hard to say what happened in those days. Avi remembers tracing his hands across the smooth hardwood floor and searching, but more than that, he remembers—

Dark, dark, dark. Just like it is now. His heart hurts for the beast inside of him.

“Avi?”

He breathes in, shuddering. “Yeah,” he says. His voice is hoarse.

Avi can’t help it. He starts crying.

“I’m… here for you,” Magnus says. “Avi. I’m here for  _you_.”

He can’t help it. He starts crying at  _that_ , too.

“If you love me,” Avi cries, “why doesn’t it feel like enough?”

“I—”

“I know you love me,” Avi continues. “God, Magnus, I love you, so,  _so_ , much. But keep wanting them back, even if they don’t want me. They were  _everything_  to me. Without them, I’m—”

His heart catches in his throat.

_Blind._

The tears don’t stop. What stops him is Magnus, soft around his shoulder.  _Even in the dark, he’s managed to find me,_  Avi thinks. He focuses on the warmth wrapped around his back, and sighs, absorbing the warmth and familiarity that comes from Magnus’s touch.

But Magnus, of course, just won’t leave things alone. “Stay right there,” he grumbles. He pats Avi on the shoulder, making Avi hyperaware of how strange their position must be, right now.

“I’ll try to stop crying,” Avi says, breathing slowly in and out.

“Or,” Magnus says, “You could just listen to me. I know you’re scared. But that’s why I’m’ here, right?”

He laughs, almost breathless. “Sure,” Avi says.

“I’m going to tell you something you told me a while ago,” Magnus growls, with a low voice, taking careful time to properly enunciate every syllable. If Avi didn’t know better, he’s think Magnus was angry. But more than anything else, Magnus sounds impassioned. “So  _listen_ , okay?”

Avi’s heart almost stops. “Okay,” he says, quiet.

Magnus huffs a laugh into Avi’s ear. “Take your own advice for once, Avi.”  _He’s warm_ , Avi thinks.  _He’s really, really warm._

“The sun is not far from here,” Magnus murmurs. “Even the littlest light will allow you to see. And if you have no light, you make your own.”

It feels like the whole time in this dark, Avi’s been drowning, and he’s only broken the water’s surface. He grapples in the dark, and finds Magnus’s hand. Carefully, he intertwines their fingers together.

He can’t help it. He smiles.

Magnus turns to face him; Avi knows this because he can feel the wind, even in complete darkness.

“Avi…” he says, and all Avi hears is simple yearning.

He lets out a deep exhale. He lets out the weight on his shoulder and lets it settle into the sky where it should be.

“I’m okay now,” he says, closing his eyes. “Magnus. I’m really, really okay.”

“Oh,” Magnus says, and then he crushes Avi in a hug, sending them tumbling to the ground. “I’m so, so happy.”

Avi grins. He feels freer than ever before. “I love you too,” he says.

Magnus lets out a strangled noise at that. “I’m kissing you when this is over,” he says.

Avi laughs. He stares up at the dark. “Okay,” he says. “Okay. Give me a minute.”

Magnus releases him from his hold.

Avi rises to his feet. He holds his hands over his heart. He closes his eyes.

“My family is not the people who left me,” Avi murmurs. “But my heritage is the ones that have come before me.”

 _I have nothing to offer_ , he thinks.  _But I have my blood, and my voice, and the memories, all passed down._

“I own these eyes of mine,” Avi hisses, opening his eyes, and sparks rustle across the void. “It is my birthright. And my family—my family is protected by my blood, by my wish.”

He feels the ground under him shake. The wisps of his memory rise up around him and comfort him like whispers.

He curls his hands over his heart. He can feel something glowing there. “Lend me your power again,” he whispers. “Even if this is the last time. For my blood, which I honor, and for my family, which I love.” 

_Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes—_

The whispers around him stumble over each other, until they all seem to meld into the wind.

 _We are not something that can be stolen so easily_ , he hears, and then the room turns a brilliant white. Struck by the sheer force of it, Avi trips backwards, and crashes into Magnus, who manages to steady him.

The room fills in with soft color slowly. Faint yellow mirages seem to swirl around the piercing white, until the room is filled with the warm brown tones of wood, the soft pinks and blues of potions, and the gray of smoke. Avi blinks rapidly, letting his eyes adjust until his vision is normal. His moon pendant floats up, casting white light around him in a sphere.

In front of them stands Robbie. His eyes glow an intent, electric blue.

“Nice to see you again?” Avi says, and he smiles wide. “I’m enjoying my gift a lot right now.”

Robbie lunges.

 

* * *

 

Magnus kicks him to the ground, and he crumples, just like that.

Avi turns towards him. He is seething with barely contained rage.

“What the fuck,” Magnus says, and he seems to glow in the smoke and shadows of this basement. “What the fuck. You  _hurt_ Avi.”

Robbie is unfazed.

“I can. I can kill him, right? I can do that?” Magnus says to no one at all, and he’s shaking.

Avi pauses. “He doesn’t go down this easily,” he says.

“What?” Magnus says.  

“Just—wait,” Avi says. “This is an anticlimactic ending,” he says. “He would hate that.”

“Robbie,” he calls.

An apparition drops from the ceiling. Avi stares right through it. He sighs, and stares at the white walls around with them. His feet almost fall out from under him, but he just smiles. “If I bleed red, it means that I am human.”

Magnus’s hands steady him from the back.

Avi reaches his hands out to the apparition, and it distorts under his touch, before dissipating.

“I still want to hurt him,” Magnus murmurs.

Avi places a hand on his shoulder. “I saw the antidote on the top shelf,” Avi says. “Now that the building isn’t burning down, we can just grab it.”

Avi turns towards Magnus and smiles. He is tired, but he is free. “I am alive, Magnus,” Avi says. “I am fine.”

“And he tried to kill you,” Magnus hisses, “and he should be dead.”

“I—” Avi sighs. He looks down at Robbie’s still body. “Magnus. He  _is_.”

Magnus blinks. “Wait—say that again?”

Avi walks forward and kicks Pringles in the stomach. His body crumbles away to reveal nothing but an inky black void.

“Blue eyes gave it away,” Avi says. “He never has blue eyes. It’s… too perfect for him, if he has blue eyes. It reminds him too much of something.”

“I never saw any blue eyes?” Magnus says. “Wait. Avi.  _I_  never saw any blue eyes.”

Avi blinks. “This seems awfully convenient,” he says, with a smile.

Magnus looks hopefully at him. “Power of true love?” he suggests.

Avi laughs. “You know what,” he says. “Why not?”

He opens his eyes and finds gold glittering in the air, staining the world with beauty, like the way a sunset seems to set the sky aglow.

Avi can’t help it. He laughs, and pulls Magnus close for a kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> theyre losers and somehow didnt notice avi summoned his dead ancestors to dismantle robbie's entire illusory field and also dismantled the blocks on avis eyes. but yeah. true love i guess. 
> 
> this was my taz bang piece for 2018!! im pretty happy with how it turned out--i wanted to write a long magvi fic bc i know there arent many of those, and i did!  
> it ended up being twice as long as originally planned, so if anyone is wondering why scenes arent written out in full, minute detail, this is why. i didnt want to disinegrate while writing this fic. uhhh sometime in the future i'll be adding a set of interludes to this piece tho!! like bonus content lol
> 
> also this title, other than being from the lyrics, of "boy problems" by carly rae jepsen, became ridiculously accurate while i was writing. i was trying to make this a light comedy and then the problems got worse and it turned out fairly angsty


End file.
